12 Things Women With Resting Bitch Face Want You to Know

This. Is. Just. My. Face.

21 March, 2018
12 Things Women With Resting Bitch Face Want You to Know

While I firmly believe that Resting Bitch Face is actually just "a woman having a face that doesn't always look happy," aka the same face men have, it doesn't seem like that term is going anywhere. Since the label is still floating around, here are some things every woman with RBF would like you to know. ​

1. I'm not mad at you, this is just my face. I know it seems like I'm mad because I'm not wearing a high-beam smile every time I look at you but this is the natural state of the face, sooooo.

2. The more you comment on my RBF, the more it becomes a legit BF. It's weird, I know, but the more you talk about how unhappy I look, I don't magically get any happier. Please note this fact.

3. Turning up the extra levels of happiness at work so your coworkers don't feel like you hate being there. I like my job, and probably you too! But I shouldn't have to pretend your face is a basket of puppies for you to know that I'm not secretly plotting to storm out of the office. But I am going to picture that basket of puppies now just for my own enjoyment.

4. I'm pretty sure you'd never accuse a guy of having RBF. You'd just assume he was thinking or existing or not having a great day, but you wouldn't be like, "Smile, your face is making you look mean." And if you would, well then, congrats on equality, I guess?

5. Telling me to smile for no reason is incredibly weird. I'll smile and laugh when I'm really happy about something. Ooo! Idea! You should be really nice to me and say funny stuff, so we can have fun, and therefore smiles will occur! I love this plan. 

6. No, I'm not depressed. But even if I were, it's also not my job to be "not depressed." It's my job to walk around with a face and make expressions when appropriate, and yay, I am doing those things!

7. I don't want to alter my natural facial expressions to make people feel better about themselves. Why do you even care that I don't look happy? If it's because you're worried about me, I'm OK and you should know that because we're friends! If it's because my not looking happy bothers you, move on with your day and also, why are we friends? ​

8. Telling me you thought I was a bitch when we first met is super awkward. Seriously, why did you tell me that, Joann? It's so weird that you told me that!!! I'm glad you don't think that now, but also now it's weird between us and that's on you. 

9. You can totally approach me at parties because I swear if I like you, my face gets friendlier-looking. It's almost as if I have a neutral face until I meet someone and then if they're cool, my face gets happier-looking and if they're not, it gets more upset-looking. It's kind of like … a face. All faces, if you will. It's like those. 

10. Having RBF is a ridiculous thing to be judged for. At this point in my life, I probably can't radically change my resting face, so it's best if we all accept this and realize this term is ridic and super gendered anyway and move the eff on. I have Netflix to watch. 

11. Just because you told me really awesome news and I didn't immediately become a human Christmas tree doesn't mean I'm not happy for you. My face doesn't always reflect happiness right away. It's kind of like turning on a TV at your grandparents have where it's from the '80s and you have to wait a few seconds for it to warm up, but it always does. My face is a TV.

12. Guys I date: Please never tell me I'm "tough." I can't be the only one who's been told by some guy on a Tinder date that I'm "a tough one" because I didn't smile like I was in a toothpaste commercial when all I knew about this guy was that he was 23, a man, and he had internet access. Give me something to smile about and I'll never stop smiling, bro. 

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Credit: Cosmopolitan
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