23 Ways Gossip Girl Would be Different In 2016

Serena would have some ~feelings~ about Gigi Hadid.

21 March, 2018

23 Ways Gossip Girl Would be Different in 2016

1. Blair and Serena would both be models. Rich and beautiful girls in the 2000s wanted to be socialites (see: Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie). Today, they want to be models (see: Kendall Jenner, Gigi Hadid).

We know, we know — Blair tried to model for her mother's clothing line and it was a disaster. But this is Blair freaking Waldorf we're talking about. Where there's a will, there's a way. Maybe she'd find more success with #ootds on Instagram than the pressures of a traditional photoshoot.

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2. Speaking of which, Serena would have some ~feelings~ about Gigi Hadid. Because they're literally the same person. They'd either become best friends or frenemies.

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3. Jenny would make extra money by promoting teatoxes and hair vitamins on Instagram. That's way easier than slaving over all those hand-calligraphed Kiss on the Lips party invitations.

4. The US election would tear the Upper East Side apart.

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5. The minions would dump açai bowls on Blair's head when she falls from Queen Bee status. Yogurt (while still healthy and yummy) is no longer the trendiest snack on the block.

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6. Blair would insist on a Snapchat geotag for the Met steps. She's ambitious and well-connected — she could actually make this happen.

7. Serena's return to New York at the beginning of season one wouldn't be such a huge mystery. Social media makes it impossible to go off the radar for a year. She was in Connecticut, not Mars.

8. Jenny would move to LA to work as Kendall and Kylie's stylist.

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9. Everyone would finally upgrade to iPhones. And stop signing all their texts with their initials.

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10. Gossip Girl would switch from text blasts to Snapchat. Fiiiiiinally.

11. Chuck wouldn't need a limo anymore. He'd just call Uber X. Honestly, it's way more discreet, and no one really rides in limos on the regular, anyway.

12. People would stop giving Serena sh*t. Yay, feminism!

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13. Dan would have a man bun. It would be luscious. He would keep it up with Jen Atkin's new line of hair products, Ouai.

14. Blair's signature would be chokers, not headbands. As blasphemous as this sounds at first glance, it's really not.

15. Nate would still secretly be dating older women. But Catherine would be out of the picture in favoor of...

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16. Rufus's band Lincoln Hawk would actually be cool. The 90s are back, and so is Lincoln Hawk. Lots of girls in slip dresses and white Chucks would show up to his set at Coachella.

17. Lily would be on Real Housewives of New York. If you subscribe to the 'Gigi Hadid is the real-life Serena van der Woodsen' theory, this isn't even a stretch.

18. Penelope, Hazel, Nelly Yuki, and the rest of the minions would spend their days double-tapping Blair's Instagrams. Also, they'd keep their title of 'minions' — the word 'squad' would be way too mainstream for them.

19. Serena wouldn't have a blog. She'd have her own app, Kylie Jenner style. And a makeup line, too.

20. Dan would finally hear about 'Damn, Daniel' several months too late and think it's the funniest thing he's ever heard. He's corny AF and kind of behind the times. Sorry, Dan, this meme has been over for awhile now.

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21. Vanessa wouldn't be so upset about that time Jenny tricked her into wearing a see-through dress. Naked dresses are all over the red carpet now.