What to Do If You Hate Giving Oral Sex

If your gag-reflex kicks off at just the thought of performing oral sex on a partner, you're not as alone as you might think you are. Because it's arguably the most intimate you can get with a person, and it's not something you want to do if your heart's not fully in it.

But that doesn't make it any less of an awkward exchange with your partner when they begin to wonder why you're not jumping at the chance of going down on them. Luckily, award-winning relationship expert and sexologist, Dr Jess, conducted an 'ask me anything' on Reddit, and she had some great advice to share when someone broached this very topic...

"My wife has a difficult time reaching climax; she gets 95% the way there and then it's gone, so sex is frustrating for her. She wishes I would give her oral sex, but for me it's a complete turn-off. Any ideas? She's a loving and willing partner, but she doesn't get the payoff she deserves."

- Bento_Box_Haiku

Here was Dr Jess' answer:

"Part of the brain shuts down right at orgasm, so you need to relinquish control to 'let' this happen. It's likely she has difficulty letting go. She should practice relinquishing control in other areas of her life (to see that catastrophe won't strike) and then carry this over into the bedroom.

"Why is oral sex a turn-off? Perhaps you can combine it with using your hands and toys at the same time. And try a flavoured lube if the taste is an issue!"