21 Things That Trigger Unreasonable Work Rage EVERY Time

Give me my mug back!

21 March, 2018
21 Things That Trigger Unreasonable Work Rage EVERY Time

1. Crunching. Eating a delicious, fresh green apple is one of life's great pleasures. Just don't do it on the desk next to me, or I will end you.

2. Filling in forms. These days, logging your every move seems to take precedence over Actually Getting Shit Done. In a world where you are required to fill-out about ten different forms, it's remarkable that anyone gets any work done.

3. Mug-stealing. Yes, we know we shouldn't be so attached to a My Little Pony mug, but just deal (and GIVE IT BACK).

4. Having to write a Missing Mug Email of Doom. There's no way of writing one of these that doesn't make you look like a total bell. If you want that mug back, you just gotta suck it up.

5. Honkers. Whether it's a honking laugh, sneeze or nose, honkers have us all like: 

6. Having to be chirpy on a hangover. Why is it that the most enthusiastic person in the world only phones you when it's all you can do not to wear sunglasses at your desk? GO RIGHT AWAY. 

7. Social media. Facebook? The social NOTworking site, more like. Amiright? Guys?

8. Email chains that go on forever. Haha Karen sent an email to the whole company instead of one person and haha someone's sent a pithy reply and oh look another one and ha another one and...OK it's not funny anymore and OH MY GOD STOP SENDING ME EMAILS. 

9. The cutlery drawer. Resistentialism is the theory that inanimate objects have got it in for us, and behave in purposefully spiteful ways. The disappearance of all the teaspoons is proof that it is real.

10. An IT department that guesses. Guess what: we too can click on every option on the menu to see how to change our email font. We were kinda hoping you'd actually know how to do it.

11. Faux-friendly passive-aggressive notes. "I expect you've noticed the mugs are being put away when they're not completely dry, lol! Shall we try to do it properly next time?" (NB: A lot of work-based douchebaggery involves mugs.)

12. Notes containing an excessive number of exclamations. These are just as bad, especially when they're written in Comic Sans.

13. The colleague who has your exact same problem, only more of it. This is about me right now, OK?

14. The stationery cupboard. It will never, ever contain a stapler. Until all you want is a Post It note, when there will be nothing but staplers as far as the eye can see.

15. Food stealers, and people who write notes on their food saying 'DO NOT STEAL!' Unfairly, these people are equally annoying. 

16. Commuting. Ahh, Yore. An age people lived and worked on a farm, and the office was the barn next door. Sure, you'd die in childbirth if toothache didn't kill you first, but you never had to deal with rush hour.

17. Overly friendly emails from strangers. If you've never met me and you open emails with, "Hi hon!!" I'm going to be weirded out. Or ask you on a date. Just to warn you.

18. That creepy guy who hits on everyone. Somehow, there's always one. (Except in politics, where there are LOADS. Jk).

19. Cliques. You thought you'd left caring about this stuff behind at school. But then a gang troops out for lunch and you're all sadface at not being invited. 

20. Your computer. "Hahaha! I will break until someone comes to fix it, when I will magically work by being switched off and on again and make you look like a tool! Moohahaha!" 

Credit: Cosmopolitan
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