1. You are a people pleaser. Even when you don't want to attend that event or help someone out, you have trouble saying no. 

2. You are always doing things for others but rarely asking others for help. You desperately need someone to help you shift home, but you feel awkward asking.

3. You find yourself lagging behind on deadlines often. Because you have so many other people to help!

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4. You think you are hurting others when you say no to them. 'But Milly will feel bad if I say I can't come over, even though all I really want to do is curl up in bed and watch that film!'


Exercise your power of choice

If you really don't want to do something then firmly tell the person asking, "I'm sorry but I can't help you with that."  You need to be strong and learn to ignore the guilt trip that you experience.

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 Try not to answer immediately

When you're not sure about your reply say, "Let me think about it". It is an acceptable response. Take your time to make a decision, but make sure you get back to the person in a set amount of time.

Consider your feelings

You must get in touch with your 'I'm comfortable feelings'. If you resent taking on the excess work then you should let the people involved know about how you feel.

Take on a smaller task instead

Sometimes you don't have to say an outright no. You can agree to do a smaller task instead of taking charge of the entire chunk of work. You can also offer alternatives and divert the person to other people who you think might be interested in helping.

You don't need an excuse

Some people think that if they don't have any other plans they are obligated to do what others ask of them. You need to realise that you might need to just relax, rejuvenate, take a break and do your own thing sometimes (without having a 'legitimate reason' for not being available!)

What do you think?