Making a guy fall for you doesn't have to involve pick-up lines or clever chatter. Experts say that body language is more powerful than words, and Cosmo's genius flirting tricks will turn you into a (silent) assassin!
Don't make a move
There's a lot of mixed advice going around about being the one to approach a guy. And while confidence is sexy, in a social scenario, it is best to let a guy make the first move. A recent study found that a guy is more likely to go out with a woman if he's the one who approaches her, rather than vice versa. That doesn't mean you have to just wait around for him to come over-there are other tricks below that'll help push things along.
Perfect your come-hither look. Tilt your head slightly down and to the side, then look up from under your lashes and smile. This pose shows guys it's okay to approach.
Slightly slow down all your gestures-cross and uncross your legs slowly, stroke your neck deliberately, or lazily fix your hair.
Divide and rule
Men tend to be intimidated by a pack of girls, so hit up a bar with just two friends. If you see a guy you like, pull away slightly from your pals and scan the room. When your eyes fall on your target, hold eye contact for a few seconds to let him know you've noticed him.
Get into flirt mode
"Make the most of body language," says Violet Blue, author of Total Flirt. Your body sends out messages you may not even consciously know, and even minor adjustments can change how men perceive you. Which is why it's important to turn on your Flirt Mode when out. To do, pull your shoulders back and take a deep breath, imagining your breath pulling your chest wider and pulling the centre of your chest up towards the ceiling. Straighten your back and arch the lower back slightly (a good way to do this, and also make your legs look longer and butt more attractive, is to wear heels). "When you make your Flirt Mode stance, you're going to project an aura of confidence and happiness," says Violet.
To become a genius flirt, don't save your skills only for a guy you like-practice on other men you meet so you can perfect your game.
While talking to a guy, touch a part of your body, like your collarbone, cheek, or leg. Touching or stroking yourself is a sign of sensuality, plus it will make the guy subconsciously think about touching you, too.
If you've ever watched lovedup couples in deep conversation, you'll notice that they're pretty much copying each other-they'll shift their positions to match the other's; when one picks up a glass, the other will do the same; and their breathing patterns will be similar. Copying someone's movements is a short-cut to creating the same intimacy real couples share-just remember to mimic sparingly so it's not obvious.
Find a name
Giving someone a personal nickname creates intimacy. With a new guy, find something positive about him-a sense of humour, muscles-and give him a nickname for that. Use it playfully through your convo.
Casually touching a guy's arm or knee while laughing at his joke is a great flirting technique-it subconsciously tells him you're interested, and makes him feel more connected to you. But, warn experts, the move can sometimes backfire, so it's smart to test a man's personal space first. "The bubble of air 18 inches around someone's body is their intimate space: a no-go zone when you first meet someone," says Judy Dutton, author of How The Science Of Sex Can Make You A Better Lover. "To see if someone's up for you breaking through this barrier, find an excuse to step briefly into this zone, say, by allowing someone behind you to pass, or to grab an appetizer off a wandering tray-then step back out again. If this person is drawn to you, he will respond by stepping in closer after you've backed off," she says.
The bumping trick
'Accidentally' bump into a man when you're waiting for drinks at the bar. It's an instant convo starter (hey, you gotta say 'sorry'), and the physical contact from your little collision makes the exchange more intimate.
Wear a convo starter
Standing out with help from a great outfit is one thing; getting noticed because of something extraordinary is even better. A flirt tool-a cool hat, clever T-shirt, or unusual accessory makes others curious, and gives them a reason to chat with you.
Work the love triangle
Allow your gaze to drink in what you see. According to experts, when talking to people, our eyes follow a 'triangle'. With acquaintances, we make a small triangle by moving our eyes from eye to eye, dipping them as we move across the bridge of the nose. When we look at the faces of friends, our eyes also include the nose and the mouth. But if we're attracted to a person, the triangle gets wider at the bottom as we incorporate their body into our gaze. Once you get the hang of the 'love triangle', let your gaze linger on his lips for a little longer. This technique sends him a subconscious message that you're wondering what it would be like to kiss him.
Talk through the hand
While at a bar, casually set your hand on your knee so your palm faces up or lay the back of your hand on a table. This pose lets him know that you're approachable and 'safe'.
Do the walk
Observe the way other girls walk, especially ones you think look sexy. Celebrities, friends, even 10 minutes at the mall will give you much to watch and learn from. Look at how well, or badly people walk. Take notes, and try out moves you like.
You might think pouting is sexy, but new research suggests that men find moody looking women a turn-off. The easiest way to disarm, relax, and intrigue a guy is with a smile. "It sounds simple, but when you're flirting, a smile is an instant relaxer, and makes guys curious about what you're smiling about," says Violet. A smile also gives the unconscious impression that you have a great sense of humour, you're approachable, and being around you is indicative of a good time. And if you are pouting, make it guyfriendly- the sexiest pout is when you relax your mouth and allow your bottom lip to drop slightly open so he can see a bit of white teeth.
Location is everything
When it comes to flirting atmospheres, not all places are born equal. Mild to moderate conditions are best, explains Violet. "Daytime parties, casual cocktails, weddings, art galleries, cafes, dinner parties, industry or business-related meets, conferences, reunions, and in classrooms are great to meet men," she says.
Lower your voice
According to research, when a woman likes a guy, she unconsciously lowers her voice, making it huskier and breathier- which guys find insanely sexy. So to let a guy know you're interested, lower your voice a couple of notches. It'll instantly put him in a more seductive mindset.
Bat those lashes
Did you know that when you like someone, you automatically blink more than usual? Up your blink rate and see if he does the same. If he does, you can safely assume he's interested in you, too. Just don't overdo it.
Make smouldering eye contact, head tipped slightly forward, using your soft smile. Maintain riveting eye contact and smile wide, keeping lips together. Now he is putty in your hands, says author of the book Total Flirt, Violet Blue.
Get a fringe
You know the adage, 'The eyes are the windows to the soul'? It's true! "Your retinas are actually the only visible part of your brain," says David Givens, Ph.D., author of Love Signals. "Peering into someone's eyes is literally like seeing into the mind itself. So, letting your hair fall slightly over your eyes-obscuring emotions telegraphed through eye contact-is coy and alluring."
Do a twinkle
There's a reason why a twinkle in the eye is so attractive- shiny eyes send a cue that you're a lively, vibrant person. While you can't really force your eyes to sparkle, you can create a similar effect with make-up. First, use eye-drops to tackle any redness, then apply a light, shimmery eyeshadow on lids. Line eyes ('wing' them at the edges for a sexy, feline look), then dab highlighter onto brow bones and blend. Highlight the inner corners and bottom rims of eyes with a light, shimmery pencil (this really opens them up), and finish with mascara.
According to Violet, where you're situated in a room is important. "Stand, don't sit, with your shoulders straight and hip cocked," she says. "Try not to be separated by more than two people, and keep your face slightly away from him: this will make your signaling powerful."