1. They're sensitive...in a good way. In fact, University of Vienna researchers found that large breasts are 24% less sensitive than small breasts. So, don't make the mistake of thinking it's the other way around. Small boobs like attention, too.
2. But take our bra off first. We might be wearing a sexy little lace number, but if we're wearing a push-up, we wouldn't be able to feel an elephant through that padding. So play it safe and take our bra off before you get too into the fondling.
3. Speaking of bras, ours can get pretty fancy. So, while we're not expecting a Gok Wan assessment of our lingerie choice (in fact, please DON'T do that), a casual "This is sexy" before you throw it on the floor, doesn't go amiss. Bras are expensive and we may well have bought this one with you in mind.
4. Motor boating probably isn't do-able. But that doesn't mean you should keep your face away from our chest. There's still kissing, licking, nibbling and a ton of other options.
5. NEVER look disappointed. While we love a lacy little bralet, sometimes nothing feels sexier than pumping our cleavage up with some padding. If you ever look confused or sad when you realise we're actually a cup size smaller, get out. Get out right now.
6. We might tease you with choice of bra. By which we mean not wearing one (or wearing a very obviously see-through one). Think you can see our nips through our top? You probably can. And we're going to make you wait until after dinner to get any closer.
7. We LOVE being on top. No need to worry about too much jiggle or sagging. So don't be offended - we're not saying your moves aren't good enough, we just like the freedom to bounce. And let's face it (literally), cowgirl rocks.
8. Don't get too rough. Give us a good squeeze, swizzle our nips and bounce us around a bit, but just remember that they are still attached to our body. You're like Spider-Man...with great power comes great responsibility.
9. And speaking of web-shooting, tit wanks aren't really our thing. But like motor boating, it doesn't mean our boobs need to be a peen-free area. Just saying...
10. Doggy can be even better. Aside from the fact there's less chance of our boobs getting sore from all that dangling, we can lower our chest or lie completely flat on our front. Try it. It rocks.
11. Plus, we like a bit of bum loving. Okay, not actual bum love (but feel free to ask politely), we're just saying we're used to dating butt guys. So, sound us out, but a bit of spanking and grabbing probably won't go amiss.
12. Be confident with your boob skills. The worst thing you can do is avoid our small boobies altogether, or grope around like you can't find them. As we've said before, imagine if we did the same with your peen. GO FORTH AND GRAB!
13. Telling us you love our boobs NEVER gets old. Seriously, never. If you don't mean it, don't say it. But if you do, scream it from the rooftops. Or, you know, just whisper it in our ear.
By The Itty Bitty Cosmo Titty Committee
See the full story on Cosmopolitan.co.uk