Your Sex Horoscope for the Weekend

Your sexoscope for the week of June 7 to June 13:

Aries

         If you’re single AF:

Work’s got you down this weekend. Boo! Friday’s Scorpio Moon carries sexual, intense vibes, so f*cking the stress away is definitely an option—if you can get anyone to look your way, that is. You’re feeling defeated, but don’t let it ruin the end of Gemini season for you! Going out with friends is a surefire way to have a good time, whether you get laid or not.

If you haven’t DTR yet:

You and your boo’s cycles aren’t in sync this weekend. Maybe you’re in the mood, but they are absolutely not, OR they’re trying to cuddle when you’re feeling grumpy AF. This doesn’t mean you’re splitting up, by any means, but a week-long break gives you some much-needed alone time this week.

If you’ve been in love forever:

You’re usually pretty optimistic and upbeat, but the astrology of this weekend is shitting on you, starting with a bad day at work on Friday. Don’t let drama from the outside world stir up drama or frustration at home—if you need space, let your S.O. know before your famously-quick temper pops off.

Taurus

         If you’re single AF:

You’re out and about, in the mood (thanks, Scorpio Moon) and bam—you and a complete snacc lock eyes from across the room. You’re usually the type to stay in your own lane, but your heart is thumping out of your chest and, NBD, but you’re p r e t t y sure they might be the love of your life. Earth to you, Taurus! Stick to your usual “let’s take it slow” mindset to avoid potential disappointment IF things don’t work out.

If you haven’t DTR yet:

Earth signs like you aren’t much for the gushy, lovey-dovey romantic side of relationships, but this weekend you feel like you’re in a fairytale romance. This weekend’s astro is good for talking about taking your ‘ship more seriously, but don’t get ahead of yourself and let that “L” word slip out—you might regret it if you do it before you really know them!

If you’ve been in love forever:

This weekend finds you in a great mood, and being with your partner is all you can think about! The sex is great, and you’re remembering why you fell in love with them in the first place. Nothing else to do but enjoy TF outta this!

Gemini

          If you’re single AF:

You’re the shit, you know you’re the shit, and you’re the absolute best when it comes to flirting, so why are all of your Tinder matches leaving you on read? There are plenty of fish in the sea, but none of them are biting. Patience, Gemini—avoid the temptation to double/triple/quadruple-text this Friday if you don’t get a response. Try again on Saturday—the Sag Moon makes hookups way more likely.

If you haven’t DTR yet:

Work keeps you away from your boo this Friday, but on Saturday, they’re all yours! Climb ‘em like a tree, have some birthday sex if yours is this weekend, and take full advantage of your time together. Because, come Sunday (and the rest of the week, too), your job and financial situation bring just enough stress to keep you occupied and away again.

If you’ve been in love forever:

You typically don’t hold grudges after arguments because 1) your scatter-brained nature makes fights easy to forget and 2) your fun-loving, friendly personality keeps drama to a minimum. Not this weekend, unfortunately—performance issues in bed and petty disagreements just hurt more than usual because of Mars in crybaby Cancer. Take a breath, go on a long drive, whatever it takes to avoid blowing up, and it’s smooth sailing by the end of the week.

Cancer

          If you’re single AF:

What’s that? It looks like you’re coming out of your shell this Friday! Dreamy Neptune and action-packed Mars push you to DM your crush or go out to find your next hookup, but restrictive Saturn makes you feel like others just aren’t receptive to your advances. If the first couple of cuties curve you, don’t get in your feelings—cast a wide net and you'll eventually find a total catch!

If you haven’t DTR yet:

Friday finds you and your boo confessing your feels for each other and the potential to define the relationship is mega-high! You’re feeling romantic AF and you’re a real horndog, too, but a relationship isn’t just about good sex or feeling all lovey-dovey—show them that you’re serious about how deep your feelings for them are, or they might think you’re just playing games.

If you’ve been together forever:

Your weekend goes one of two ways—luckily, both options start off with a bang on Friday, thanks to the Scorpio Moon making your sex life better than usual! Depending on where you both are at in the relationship, one (or both) of you might feel that it’s time to take things more seriously. Alternatively, you could also get cold feet when this major topic comes up, and suggest taking things a little slower.

Leo

          If you’re single AF:

Your sex drive flares up with real gusto this Friday, but you’re not feeling up to heading out or hitting up your crush, so rubbing one (or two, or three) out seems to be your best bet for satisfying your libido. After a cat nap, you wake up Saturday still hankering for a hookup, but your energy levels feel high enough to slide into someone’s DMs.

If you haven’t DTR yet:

You’re staying in this Friday, thanks to the Scorpio Moon putting you in a drowsy mood. You might act like you don’t GAF if your boo sleeps over, but you definitely do (and want them to!) Listen, they’re not a mind reader, so if you want to spend time together, speak now or forever hold your peace! Honor your feels—they’re especially deep this week—and you won’t have a problem!

If you’ve been in love forever:

You can be needy (*Ariana Grande voice* way too damn needy) but you’re afraid of coming off as too clingy this weekend. Honesty is the best policy, little Leo—if you want to be a pillow princess and get pampered by your partner, let ‘em know! They wouldn’t be with you if they weren’t happy to oblige.

Virgo

         If you’re single AF:

You’re kind of a sex magnet this Friday! You’re chattier than normal and naturally standing out more, so getting your flirt on is basically guaranteed, and you have plenty of cuties to pick from! Just a heads up—a one night stand is just that, so if you catch feels for your no-strings-attached playmate, don’t expect them to be reciprocated.

If you haven’t DTR yet:

You've been seeing each other for a while now, and you might be thinking that you want to be exclusive with them, buuuuuut (and there’s always a “but”), they might not be on the same page as you. You’re a control freak, so when they say they’re not sure if they’re ready for monogamy, you’re tempted to just say “f*ck it” and GTFO of this situationship. Don’t just yet. Give them the week to think it over, then make your move if you're not happy with the answer.

If you’ve been in love forever:

You’re a planner—you obsess over listing out and scheduling everything in your life, so when you bring up the future of your relationship (moving in together, marriage, starting a family, etc.) and they aren’t 100% in agreement with your future goals, it feels like everything is falling apart. Take a chill pill, Virgo. These are big decisions! Give it time, and see where you can and can't compromise.

Libra

         If you’re single AF:

Friday night’s Scorpio Moon provides some mega-sexy vibes that put you in the mood, so out you go in search of your next hookup! You’re usually a total flirt, but a couple faux pas or a slip of the tongue has you feeling very in your own head. Brush it off and use your quick Libran wit to make a joke and charm the cutie you’re chatting up even more, and you’re basically guaranteed to get lucky.

If you haven’t DTR yet:

The Scorpio Moon this Friday brings a calm, cool vibe and puts you in the mood for slow, sensual sex with your boo, and things go great! Being represented by the Scales constellation, you need a sense of balance—especially in relationships. A disagreement breaks out this week, and you risk losing your sense of equilibrium and your metaphorical scales swing back and forth, so you overreact. Chill out—they’ll come around eventually, and if they don’t, it wasn’t meant to be!

If you’ve been in love forever:

Drama at work has been a little much lately, but don’t let it affect life at home or you risk stirring the pot with your partner (especially if you live together) and making life in and out of the bedroom feel sort of awk. You’ve gotta learn to let go of the baggage outside of your relationship so it doesn’t screw things up with your favorite person. Leave the drama at the office and try to brush it off so you can enjoy the otherwise peaceful weekend.

Scorpio

          If you’re single AF:

This Friday has some seriously-steamy astrology brewing, so count on checking “getting laid” off your to-do list! You’re an emotional water sign (as much as you hate to show like, any feelings ever), so the passionate energy that makes sex feel so fantastic this weekend also has the potential of making you catch major feels. To modify an old saying, you’d benefit from wishing for the best, expecting a fun one-night-stand, but preparing to get ghosted.

If you haven’t DTR yet:

Your issue is you want to be completely emotionally entangled with your boo sometimes. The connection you have with them this weekend feels crazy intense, and you’re aching to determine the relationship, but your infamous fear of vulnerability kicks in and you choke up when the opportunity to speak up comes around. Push past your hesitation and a serious relationship may be in the works this week!

If you’ve been in love forever:

The Moon in your sign + über-emotional Neptune + your ruling planet, Mars all join forces this weekend to bring stupid levels of romance and chemistry to the bedroom! It feels like a honeymoon on Friday, so definitely take advantage of this rare and powerful astrology! Things are back to normal when the week starts, and coming down from your love-high isn’t a great feeling. Don’t let it sour your great weekend, thought—you gotta take the good times with the average, right?

Sagittarius

          If you’re single AF:

You’re feeling pretty crushed by the heavy Scorpio Moon this Friday, so heading out isn’t an option—but sleeping off the grouchiness until Saturday afternoon sounds perfect. You spend the rest of your weekend trying to get back to your usually upbeat attitude, but you’re feeling uncharacteristically under pressure this week, and getting it in is the last thing you’re worried about, TBH!

If you haven’t DTR yet:

Your bad mood pops out if your boo even looks at you wrong this weekend. You’re hot-headed AF and you know how you are—if any one sign lived by the saying “shoot first, ask questions later,” it’s yours. Spend some time alone and go for a walk or even a mini-roadtrip (your fave!) until you can cut the ‘tude. Make sure you text bae back once or twice and let them know you’re still alive—you don’t want them to think they got ghosted!

If you’ve been in love forever:

Even for you, the most outgoing and bright of the fire signs, this Friday’s Scorpio Moon is gloomy enough to put out your flame and make you feel like you’ve lost your spark. Nothing seems to brighten your mood—not even sexytime with your partner—and the Moon in your sign on Saturday and Sunday means that this weekend is going to be an emotional one.

Capricorn

         If you’re single AF:

Scorpio Moons like the one this Friday tend to make you stand out in the crowd in the best ways—so much that you might get overwhelmed by all of the cuties gravitating your way! Collect as many numbers as you can (and try to keep everyone’s name straight) but also don’t get your hopes up that this weekend is when you meet the LOYL—Saturn, planet of blockages, plus Saturday’s Sagittarius Moon might mean that your one night stand likely disappears by the morning.

If you haven’t DTR yet:

What’s holding you back, Capricorn? Your boo wants to get serious about your relationship, but they’re totally afraid of starting the capital “T” Talk! They just know you too damn well—you’re a control freak, and they’re waiting on you to make the first move. Well? What are you waiting for?

If you’ve been in love forever:

Your sign tends to keep it simple in the bedroom, but when you do decide to try something new, you go all out! How does dirty talk sound? This weekend hot-and-bothered Mars combines energy with theatrical, romantic Neptune in your chart’s zones of relationships and communication, respectively, so this astrology is literally perfect for flexing your acting skills and having a blast roleplaying and talking dirty.

Aquarius

         If you’re single AF:

You’re in a rush to get home from work on Friday, but end up having to stay late and going out doesn’t appear to be in the stars, unfortunately. Saturday and Sunday’s Sagittarius Moon is much better for testing the waters and trying to hunt down your next crush, but your phone going off every five minutes with a new text or email from coworkers sort of crushes your mood. If you want to have any sort of fun, put your phone on ‘Do Not Disturb’ all weekend long!

If you haven’t DTR yet:

You’re sort of a control freak—all fixed signs are—and you’re ready to cut to the chase with your situationship and make something real happen with it. Learn to enjoy the process of flirting, teasing, playing around, and (for lack of a better word) courting your crush. If you’re feeling thirsty but they aren't, leave it alone. Always respect boundaries.

If you’ve been in love forever:

Sorry, Aquarius, but this weekend isn’t as easy breezy as Gemini season usually is for your sign. You feel like you’re in a rut at work/school and you can’t break out of the dull routine, so in an attempt to feel free, you’ve been acting up at home more and your S.O. is feeling very over it. Playing games was cute when you first met forever ago, but poking and prodding your partner out of boredom gets old for them fast, so chill out!

Pisces

          If you’re single AF:

There’s an intense attraction between you and a stranger at the bar this Friday, and thanks to dreamy Neptune’s influence in your chart’s zone of foreign travel right now, you’re basically guaranteed that they're not from around here. Sounds great, right? Although you’re initially seeing sparks, nothing lasts forever, unfortunately—and it seems this hottie is heading home soon (but hey, if the connection is amazing, get their # anyway!)

If you haven’t DTR yet:

Commitment isn’t something you really do easily—you’re very much a “free love” type of sign—so going through the motions of dating, romance, doing it, and starting a *gulp* relationship feels a little slippery to you. Don’t worry, Pisces, you’re doing great sweetie! You’re crazy emotional and feel like you’re doing everything wrong around your crush, but when they’re with you, it still feels so right. Aren’t you all about going with the flow? Get out of your own head and try to take it easy—by the end of the week, your relationship might level up.

If you’ve been in love forever:

You’re feeling the love this weekend, and whenever your partner’s at home with you, you want to ravish them in bed until you’re both tuckered out! Listen—this fairytale-esque romantic vibe is sort of exclusive to your sign (read the other signs’ horoscopes, you’ll see) so take advantage of this weekend’s astrology and bone as much as possible!