'Post','upload' and 'share', three words that are the tickets to riding the emotional roller coster involved in posting a selfie. While there is absolutely nothing wrong with feeling good about yourself, and wanting the world to see how LIT you are, there are definitely phases that we all go through once we decide to put a new selfie out into the world. Here are the 11 key phases of posting a selfie on Social Media.
Step 1: Trying to get the right lighting. Windows, angles, selfie light rings, even extra flash lights! No light is too much light when it comes to capturing the perfect selfie.
Step 2: Getting your best friends to weigh in. Asking on your BFF group chat if a selfie is good enough to post, and getting your BFFs to choose the best one (out of 25) is an integral part of the process.
Step 3: Picking the right filter, brightness, crop, and editing. This basically involves using all your skills and tools to become the softest, most glowing and best version of yourself. Don't tamper too much with perfection though. You are fabulous, just as you are.
Step 4: Choosing the right caption. The idea is to be funny, hot, smart and succinct at the same time, without going for overkill. Choosing the right caption can be errrything when it comes to posting a selfie.
Step 5: The actual act of posting. This is a time when you tend to get nervous for a second and then just go with it. If you are really hardcore about getting those views and likes in, you might save this step for prime posting times (3-4pm and 8-9pm)
Step 6: Brb, having an anxiety attack. Did Instagram crash? It's been 44 seconds and no one has liked the picture yet. As your stress levels start to rise and you consider taking the picture off, your most loyal followers begin to appear just in time to stop you from having a full-fledged panic attack.
Step 7: Here come the likes. Your BFFs, friends and even those random regulars, everyone seems to be liking and commenting on your post. You are hit by a sense of reassurance and are almost high on the positive affirmations, patting yourself on the back for being so fab.
Step 8: Time to stop acting like an addict. You begin to realise you are watching your post a little too closely, and put your phone away for a bit to try and focus on other things.
Step 9: The arrival of your crush. This is possibly the reason you put up the pic to begin with. You pick up your phone to realise that your crush or SO has liked your picture, making you feel warm and tingly all over.
Step 10: The analysis. You start to notice your like-to-comment ratio (everybody has a different one), those who have not liked your post (like your ex), some flaws that you never saw before and basically take a stock of all the action that has happened around your picture.
Step 11: Honestly, it's just a post! It's been over 4 hours and you start to realise you are over it. Unless you are an influencer or a celebrity, your selfie is not going to pay the bills. With that in mind, you log off from social media and get on with living your life and loving yourself. All of course, until the urge to post another selfie beckons and the cycle begins all over again.