10 Things All Mumbaikars Are Tired Of Hearing...

We goddamn CAN survive on vada pav.

People, who have never lived in Mumbai, have so many misconceptions about Mumbai and Mumbaikars. This is something I realised when I recently moved to Delhi for an internship. Here are some of the most common questions I was asked when anybody (and their uncle!) found out that I was from Mumbai!

1. "How do y'all manage to travel in local trains packed with sweaty people?! 

Okay, this is the biggest misconception people have about Mumbai locals.  It's not crowded at all hours and you won't die sweating. The doors and windows are open for a reason. Also, if you are a daily commuter via Mumbai local, you can get a first class pass for a pretty reasonable amount of money and the crowd in the first class compartment is always less than the crowd in a second class. BTW, we now have a metro too.

2. "Isn't Mumbai more expensive than other places in India?"

The public transport is pretty cheap. The auto-rickshaws and taxis run on meter so the drivers can't really charge you according to their moods. Two vada pavs ​with a ​cutting chai​ is a satisfactory breakfast in Mumbai for a bus conductor as well as a bachelor who doesn't have time to make breakfast before work. Real estate is expensive. After all, it's the commercial capital of India. You'll live, though.

3. "Don't y'all go clubbing every weekend?"

We wish! But no, that's so not the case. Yes, Mumbai is safe and has an amazing night life but that doesn't mean we go out every weekend. 

 4. "You guys aren't used to cold weather, right? You must freeze anywhere above 20 degrees!"

YASSS! We love Winter and we want cold weather in Mumbai, but 16 degrees is enough for us to put our fancy jackets, scarves and boots to use! Anywhere lower than that temperature is a pain. Lonavala, in our opinion, is a hill station. 

5. "Why is everybody always in such a hurry?!"

Because we like to MOVE! Start early, finish early and have a relaxing evening; that's the dream.  Afternoons are too sticky to travel anyway!

6.  "You must be so used to seeing Bollywood celebrities walking around, right?!"

​No, Shah Rukh Khan is not found roaming the streets of Bandra. Buuuuuut... We'll let you in on a little secret, if you happen to be in Mumbai at some point, dine at Yauatcha. Especially, the night there is an award function being held at MMRDA, BKC. Thank us later. 

​7. "WHY is there so much traffic in Mumbai?"

​Umm, maybe because it is the most populated city in India and everybody wants to shift here? Don't crib about the traffic here, okay? We're trying to manage! 

​8. "Do you guys ever reach anywhere on time?"

​Yeah, pretty much. Nobody values time as much as a Mumbaikar does. We know how crucial it is to catch the 7:19AM Churchgate fast. You can leave without having a shower but missing the local is NOT an option!

​9. "Do couples really get kinky in public there?"

​Yes. At Bandstand and Marine Drive or in an auto-rickshaw. Real estate is expensive, I told you. 

​10. "Why do you love Bombay so much anyway?!!" 

'Cause it's BOMBAY, bro.