Reddit Users Reveal Biggest Lies They Were Told as Kids

Parents tell kids the funniest things...

21 March, 2018
Reddit Users Reveal Biggest Lies They Were Told as Kids

You know the saying 'kids say the funniest things,' well really it's the adults that say the funniest things to kids. Although grown ups insist lying is BAD, very very BAD and will make your nose grow super long, many parents just can't help testing what ridiculous fantasies their little ones will believe. 

A Reddit invited the internet to share the 'biggest lie you were told as a kid.' Here are 12 of the porkies shared on the thread...

1. 'The candy next to the checkout line are not for sale.​'

​2. 'My Mum would always tell me I was the "easiest physical birth out of all of the kids." I felt proud until at the age of 18 I was told I was adopted.'

3. 'Telling me I was allergic to sugar.'

4. 'My father told me that when I turned 13 I would receive my birthright - nearly unlimited magical powers. I believed him, because I was 4 and believed things my dad told me.'

5. 'When I was a child my dad told me that I used to have a tail. He said that he had to cut off because I kept turning into a giant monkey and started destroying everything during the full moon. I was so disappointed when I figured it all out...'

6. 'My mom always said that when I became a lawyer, I'd be fighting women off with a stick. Well I've been a lawyer for five years already and Tinder strongly disagrees with that statement.'

7. '"The door is locked because mommy was helping daddy hang a picture behind the door and we didn't want you to open it and hit us." God damn how many times you guys are hanging pictures behind the door at night.'

8. 'If I didn't sit still during a haircut, the barber would cut my ear off. The worst part was that the barber would play along.'

9. 'That if I misbehaved in the car, the car would be sad (I think I was 5 or something). Fast forward a year and I'm tearfully telling the car that I'm sorry he has to go, but I'm sure he'll be a cool plane in his next life.'

10. "I have eyes in the back of my head." I went home crying because I was blind - the eyes in the back of my head weren't working like my teacher's were!'

11. 'That when the ice-cream van is playing music it means it is sold out.'

12. 'My sister told me that if I burped with my mouth closed, no one would be able to hear it. I believed this until my mid-20s without ever really thinking about it until one day a coworker called me on it.'

What lies did your parents tell you when you were small? Let us know your stories on our Facebook page...

Credit: Cosmopolitan
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