This Is How You Politely Tell Your Neighbors Their Sex Is Too Loud

The general rule of thumb is that if you can hear your neighbors having sex, because they're having loud sex, you should mind your own business and leave them to their fornicating. Especially in apartment buildings with thin walls, hearing your neighbors' 2 a.m. bone sesh is inevitable. You just gotta let it go. 

Some people don't follow this rule and are assholes about it and do things like embarrassingly live-tweet their neighbors loud sex. But then there are other people who are actually polite about sending a "Hey, but can you hush?" memo, like this person, who practically sent their neighbor a loud sex care package with a kind note inside. 

Going viral on Imgur, the note was sent in a package containing a variety of condoms to some neighbors whose late-night sexy time was proving disruptive. It's honestly the only acceptable way to say something about someone else's loud sex, to my knowledge. It's so polite. The person who wrote this letter even realizes it's inherently uncool to even say anything at all about loud sex.

"I'm trying to be cool about it but one of the people that live hear [sic] is ready to make a noise complaint or something because it happens so late at night," the mystery penman wrote. "To show that we are cool with you getting laid, we have included some condoms for you to use." HOW NICE. 

The note ends with a nice little "Anyways enjoy the sex," and a disclaimer that the sender takes no responsibility for broken condoms. 

If you're ever even considering saying something to some neighbors who can't help but turn their sex routine into a public event, borrow a move from this guy and send a "ENJOY THE SEX" care package. All other methods of retaliation are unacceptable and rude. 

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