6 Worrying Signs to Look Out For Early in a Relationship

Toxic relationship is a phrase that gets thrown around a lot, but it’s difficult to know exactly what it means and how to tell whether your relationship is healthy with a few teething problems, or if it's actually something to be worried about. According to psychologists, a toxic relationship is one that is fundamentally unhealthy, and is causing you, or the other person, harm - mentally or even physically. Sheelaa M Bajaj, the author of The Love Mirage, an acclaimed life coach and a numerologist, says the reason most do not realise they are in a toxic relationship until its too late because “they’ve lived in a toxic environment at some point in their lives. Learning to tolerate abuse may come from deep rooted behaviors that we have seen and watched very early in our life, maybe the way our parents treated each other what we saw on TV and movies.”

Sheela lists down a few red flags that shouldn’t escape your attention. 

1. When he tries to control you by telling you how to be, what to be, who to be, what to wear, how to talk, what to do and not to do. In the beginning it might feel like he is too much into you and is possessive but eventually you will begin to see clearly how this affects your relationship. So it's better to get cautious right in the beginning.

2. Usually all this starts with a love bombing phase. “The person overwhelms you with so much affection, love and romance that the needy side of you gets addicted to this rush and feeling wanted,” says Sheelaa. When something is too good to be true it probably is not true.

3. If he forever tries to find fault with you, you should be concerned.  When someone tells you how perfect you are and thereafter finds fault with you and tries to change you that’s a sign to look out for.

4. He keeps you away from your friends and family. If you feel like you have to ask permission before hanging out with your friends or family, then your partner may be possessive. This is a sign that he might be trying to isolate you from others to prevent them from helping you escape the relationship. This helps him exert control over you.

5. He plays the victim card. In a toxic relationship, you will notice that your partner will point fingers at you to make you feel guilty, or simply ignore his role in creating the problem. He will mostly play the victim card, which can also be called emotional manipulation.

6. He hardly ever keeps his promise. When confronted over something he isn’t supposed to do, he wriggles his way out by promising that he wouldn’t repeat it but never keeps his words. These are tell-tale signs of a toxic relationship, you need to act before it’s too late.