Ranbir Kapoor

Meanwhile, Ranbir has more of a car-enthusiast approach towards talismans. His lucky wheels? 3 black cars, a red postal truck and of course, his mom Neetu Kapoor's birth date. 

[instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2eN_epg1Du/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram]

Varun Dhawan

Bollywood’s very own lucky-charm, Varun Dhawan, has a lucky routine that is hands-down the best on this list! Well, it does involve a tub of caramel popcorn at PVR, to say the least.

[instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2gK446FDAz/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram]

Twinkle Khanna

Mrs Funnybones does not think of messing the Vastu of your bedroom as a laughing matter. And, her son, Aarav, found out the hard way!

[instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2gr7IIF8Vh/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram]

Arjun Kapoor

While Arjun may be winning Instagram with his adorable #Throwback posts about his sisters, it may be a tad difficult for him to follow his lucky ritual involving remote controls, one of the biggest bone of contention among siblings.

[instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2gcJ9phvzV/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram]

Lastly, Karan Johar

Like a wise owl, KJo has *mic drop* talisman to end all lucky charms - self-belief! After all, isn't it easier if you are your own lucky charm?

[instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2gdJN0FfkQ/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram] ","body_with_product_for_feed":"

Black cars, red mail trucks, and pillows facing a particular direction or a tub of popcorn!

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These are not the lyrics of a Lil Pump song but a few of the bizarre superstitions in Bollywood.

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Actor Sonam Kapoor seems to have inspired her friends and family to reveal their lucky charms or just quirky superstitions aka ‘The Zoya Factor’ in time for the movie that releases Friday. With the Saturn, Mercury retrogrades as well as Friday 13th well behind us, if you are still feeling a little under the weather, check out these celeb-approved talismans to get some blessings headed your way.

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Alia Bhatt

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Remember when Paulo Coelho, and later Shah Rukh Khan in Om Shanti Om, said - When you want something, the entire universe conspires in helping you to achieve it? Well, turns out Alia truly stands by this law of attraction.

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A post shared by Fox Star Hindi (@foxstarhindi) on

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Ranbir Kapoor

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Meanwhile, Ranbir has more of a car-enthusiast approach towards talismans. His lucky wheels? 3 black cars, a red postal truck and of course, his mom Neetu Kapoor's birth date. 

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A post shared by Team Ranbir Kapoor Malaysia 🇲🇾 (@my_ranbirkapoor) on

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Varun Dhawan

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Bollywood’s very own lucky-charm, Varun Dhawan, has a lucky routine that is hands-down the best on this list! Well, it does involve a tub of caramel popcorn at PVR, to say the least.

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A post shared by Sonam K Ahuja (@sonamkapoor) on

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Twinkle Khanna

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Mrs Funnybones does not think of messing the Vastu of your bedroom as a laughing matter. And, her son, Aarav, found out the hard way!

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A post shared by Sonam K Ahuja (@sonamkapoor) on

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Arjun Kapoor

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While Arjun may be winning Instagram with his adorable #Throwback posts about his sisters, it may be a tad difficult for him to follow his lucky ritual involving remote controls, one of the biggest bone of contention among siblings.

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A post shared by Arjunkwellwisher (@arjunkwellwisher) on

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Lastly, Karan Johar

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Like a wise owl, KJo has *mic drop* talisman to end all lucky charms - self-belief! After all, isn't it easier if you are your own lucky charm?

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A post shared by Sonam K Ahuja (@sonamkapoor) on

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\r\n","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"sch_body":"Black cars, red mail trucks, and pillows facing a particular direction or a tub of popcorn! These are not the lyrics of a Lil Pump song but a few of the bizarre superstitions in Bollywood. Actor Sonam Kapoor seems to have inspired her friends and family to reveal their lucky charms or just quirky superstitions aka ‘The Zoya Factor’ in time for the movie that releases Friday. With the Saturn, Mercury retrogrades as well as Friday 13th well behind us, if you are still feeling a little under the weather, check out these celeb-approved talismans to get some blessings headed your way. Alia Bhatt Remember when Paulo Coelho, and later Shah Rukh Khan in Om Shanti Om, said - When you want something, the entire universe conspires in helping you to achieve it? Well, turns out Alia truly stands by this law of attraction. [instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2eI6Jpj3dq/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram] Ranbir Kapoor Meanwhile, Ranbir has more of a car-enthusiast approach towards talismans. His lucky wheels? 3 black cars, a red postal truck and of course, his mom Neetu Kapoor's birth date.  [instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2eN_epg1Du/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram] Varun Dhawan Bollywood’s very own lucky-charm, Varun Dhawan, has a lucky routine that is hands-down the best on this list! Well, it does involve a tub of caramel popcorn at PVR, to say the least. [instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2gK446FDAz/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram] Twinkle Khanna Mrs Funnybones does not think of messing the Vastu of your bedroom as a laughing matter. And, her son, Aarav, found out the hard way! [instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2gr7IIF8Vh/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram] Arjun Kapoor While Arjun may be winning Instagram with his adorable #Throwback posts about his sisters, it may be a tad difficult for him to follow his lucky ritual involving remote controls, one of the biggest bone of contention among siblings. [instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2gcJ9phvzV/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram] Lastly, Karan Johar Like a wise owl, KJo has *mic drop* talisman to end all lucky charms - self-belief! After all, isn't it easier if you are your own lucky charm? [instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2gdJN0FfkQ/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram] "},"isSSR":false,"ttl":1582557803789},"https://www.cosmopolitan.in/api/category/life":{"status":200,"response":[{"nid":"19591","title":"Here's How You Can Master the Art of Sex Appeal","field_dek":"It’s not rocket science. It’s not even hard. Here’s how to boost your power of attraction. \r\n\r\n \r\n","modified":"2020-02-23 07:00:01","status":"1","field_full_dek":" \r\n\r\nI have a friend—I’ll call her RM—who can enter a room and effortlessly have all the dudes eating out of her hand. On three occasions, three separate male friends contacted me within 24 hours of meeting her to ask if she is single. Thing is, RM isn’t a Priyanka Chopra look-alike or a bombshell with perma-blowout. She’s down-to-earth and adorable. She wears reading glasses, peasant dresses, and an open smile. A textbook sexpot she is not, yet everyone want to bask in her presence. \r\n\r\nWe all know it when we  see it—that ineffable quality that seems to settle, fairy-dust-like, on certain people wherever they go. “It’s a genuine sexiness, not just ‘I’m trying to look like that hot girl on Instagram,” says Sari Cooper, a sex therapist in New York City. (She calls it sex esteem.) And as more flirting takes place within Tinder’s messaging system, face-to-face magnetism has become more rare. “We’ve become lazy and forgotten that charisma is still essential in dating,” says Mathew Hussey, the dating coach behind HowToGetTheGuy.com and a Cosmo columnist. What works online—quick and snarky humour—doesn’t always work in person. “Texting will only get you to the point of the date. After that, it’s up to you to actually charm someone.” That charisma can help your dating life-—you’ll get a leg up on the girls tucked in corners at parties, furiously swiping left—but it can also keep the spark strong in a relationship, and boost your success at work and in other aspects of your world. And while this appeal involves a level of cool that can seem indefinable, really, anyone can master it. As Hussey puts it: “If you can be good with people in a world where everybody else is getting worse, you’re going to win.”\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nGo out with a #GirlSquad \r\n\r\nIt’s funny asking RM what makes her so magnetic—its nothing she is aware of, so it’s like asking a tiger why it’s striped. “It only happens when I’m out with you guys,” she says. “Guys don’t come up to me when I’m sitting by myself.” She meant it as a deflection, but turns out, she’s on to something. People want to talk to the person everyone else wants to talk to. Seed a little attention around yourself, and it’ll spread. A study from the University of California at San Diego even found that people in a groups look more attractive than the same people on their own. Having fun—as opposed to staging carefully curated, broody press—is key. \r\n\r\nAmit Joshi, 29, a musician in New Delhi, says, “When you see a woman in a group of people putting out a positive vibe and get a sense that that joy is genuine, that’s attractive.”\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nChannel Your Chatty Side  \r\n\r\nRather than waiting around to spot and chat up someone you are strongly attracted to, make a habit of socialising with as many people as possible, Hussey suggests. “I encourage my clients to say ‘hi’ to as many people as possible in the first 10 minutes of the evening, so that an hour later, all those people feel that you’re the most approachable person in the room,” he says. Think about it: when a hot guy wants to flirt with someone, who is he going to approach—the girl he hasn’t said a word to or the girl he shared some fun banter with?\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nKnow How to Really Connect\r\n\r\nAsk emotional questions instead of logical ones (like, ‘What do you like best about being an engineer?’ versus ‘How long have you been doing that?’).  This trick breeds a convo both of you will find more engaging and revealing. “Nobody cares to hear routine facts in the beginning,” Hussey points out. “What we care about is connecting.”\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nLet Your ‘You’ Flag Fly \r\n\r\nPart of Rhea’s secret is that she is full of stories and interests you don’t see coming—she recently brought a kitten to a convenience store! And that surprise factor is sexy. “When someone brings up a hobby or experience that’s different from what I would have expected of them, that’s sexy and intriguing,” says Rohan Parekh, a 30-year-old attorney from Mumbai.\r\n\r\nAnother reason these admissions can turn men into heart-eyes emoji: they show vulnerability, a rare trait in an age of social media braggadocios. “Everyone goes out with their guard up in such a big way,” says Hussey. “When everyone else is trying to be somebody and play a role, the person who stands out is the one who is fun and playful, and doesn’t take herself too seriously.”   n\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n5 more moves that make you the coolest Girl at the Party\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nPrep Your Answer to ‘How’s it Going?’ \r\n\r\n“Never go out without knowing the most interesting thing that’s happened to you all week,” says Hussey. Most of us hit the lowlights (‘You know, work...’), so have a few stories ready beforehand. Even, ‘I tried the best restaurant on Tuesday!’ gets the ball rolling. \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nPre-Game With Your Funniest Friend \r\n\r\nAs you’re getting ready or heading over to the party, call a friend who cracks you up, Hussey advises. “You’ll arrive in the right state of mind.” Amused...and amusing. \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nBust Out Some Trivia\r\n\r\nI can’t tell you how many conversations I’ve sparked with weird nuggets from the podcast Radiolab Invisibilia, and 99% Invisible. Interesting ephemera always beats out ‘So do you have siblings?’\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nAsk a Favour\r\n\r\nAsk a guy to hold your coat while you grab a round, suggests Hussey, who points out research shows doing you a favour makes someone like you more. \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nTake Sides\r\n\r\nGet his opinion on something you are passionate about, a la ‘My friend says The Hunger Games franchise is stupid, and I freaking love it. What do you think?’ That way, “you’re giving him an in on fun conversation,” Hussey says.\r\n","type":"story","field_meta_title":null,"field_meta_description":null,"field_meta_keyword":"Cosmopolitan, Cosmopolitan india, Cosmopolitan magazine, cosmo, cosmo india, sex appeal , how to be sexy, how to seem more sexy, how to learn sex apeal, how to be more attractive to men, become more attractive to men","image":"https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/sites/cosmo/sites/default/files/2020-02/Screen%20Shot%202020-02-19%20at%201.47.24%20pm.png?SgKV2gi8kstBuXkFb0yrQVsAsZISlYml","field_editory_by":null,"path":"/life/features/a19591/heres-how-you-can-master-art-sex-appeal","created":"23 February 2020 ","time_created":"2020-02-23T12:30:00+05:30","field_section":"Life","field_section_url":"/life","field_content_type":"Features","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"field_first_name":null,"authorpath":null,"userPicUrl":null},{"nid":"19647","title":"If You're Reaching a Burnout, Here's How You Should Deal With It ","field_dek":"Millennials have been called  ‘generation burnout’, with young women  especially hitting full-blown burnout by the age of 30. Here’s how to step down off the ledge. \r\n","modified":"2020-02-23 06:30:01","status":"1","field_full_dek":"\r\n\r\nThe need to find meaning in work leads to greater emotional investment\r\n\r\nI went into therapy a week before Christmas, and it took just one session for me to understand what had been building up for ages. I ticked all the burnout boxes,” says 28-year-old Event Coordinator Maria. “This time last year, I’d never even heard of the ‘Millennial Burnout’. Burnout was something that happened to middle-aged corporate men. I’d covered it up, but eventually I screwed up so badly that my boss asked me to take a month off, insisting that I get help. I’ve lost a lot of ground and compromised my professional reputation, but I was lucky. I could have also lost my job.’ \r\n\r\nA 2014 survey by job-placement service Monster Worldwide found that Millennials are experiencing burnout in the highest numbers—86% as opposed to 76% of their more seasoned colleagues. Other studies reflect the same findings. Most worrying, ‘Millennial burnout’ affects more than the workplace: according to a Journal Of Personality And Social Psychology article, Generational Differences in Young Adults’ Life Goals, Concern Of Others and Civic Orientation, Gen Y’s high levels of burnout are matched by elevated anxiety, depression and mental-health issues. Millennial women are the hardest-hit. “A Millennial Female Burnout Syndrome is emerging,” says Erica Dhawan, strategic consultant and CEO of Cotential. “It’s women \r\n\r\nMillennials are constantly engaged and in a way, always ‘working’\r\n\r\nWho are ‘burning out by 30’”, writes business journalist Larissa Faw in Forbes magazine.\r\n\r\nWhy? “Millennials are known for several things: wanting to work for meaning instead of money, environmental consciousness and—last, but not least—perfectionism,” says Robert Biswas-Diener, Co-author of The Upside Of Your Dark Side. According to MTV’s No Collar Worker’s study, this need to find meaning in work leads to longer hours and much greater emotional investment—which take their toll. But perfectionism is the kicker. “The downside to perfectionism is that it’s associated with bodily complaints, increased depression and increased burnout,” says Biswas-Diener. Psychologist Jane Dannerup of jmdpsych.com says that women are often disproportionately affected by the perceived need to be perfect. “Since birth, today’s 20-something women have been  bombarded with misleading messages about what’s attainable—from body shape and beauty to work success and relationships,” she says. “They tend to push themselves very hard, often beyond sustainable levels, and become disillusioned when they have only exhaustion and self-depletion to show for it.” On top of this, there’s the economic downturn and lack of job placements, which means Millennials face huge competition and have to work—then harder still to prove themselves and advance. In a workforce tainted by out-moded gender bias, women feel this pressure most keenly. But surely there must be more to the surge in Millennial burnout than perfectionism? Something  that’s unique to Gen Y? Long before Gossip Girl’s Blair Waldorf and Pretty Little Liars’ Spencer Hastings, there were F.R.I.E.N.D.S’ Monica Geller and Desperate Housewives’ Bree Van\r\nDe Kamp. Yes, there is more—and it’s what happens when you throw tech 24/7 connectivity into the mix. Where previous generations enjoyed real downtime during which they could check in with themselves in absolute privacy and recharge their batteries without performance pressure, Millennials are constantly engaged, permanently ‘on’ and, in a way, always ‘working’. It’s this, says Dannerup, that has most tipped the scales. “When you’re constantly contactable, you don’t have the opportunity to switch off properly”, she says. “It’s easier to become jaded because, without time for free-association reflection, we aren’t in a head space in which we can identify new desires and ambitions to re-energise ourselves and fuel our passions.” \r\n\r\nIn terms of how our mind functions, the line between work and leisure has become extremely blurry. There’s not that much difference in the mode between selling your new idea to your colleagues and maintaining your hard-earned Twitter rep while live-Tweeting ‘Our Perfect Wedding’. What’s more, Millennials are increasingly expected to leverage their online presence to the benefit of their employers, with the inevitable result that being connected 24/7 comes scarily close to working 24/7. Viewed in this light, it’s not Millennial burnout that’s remarkable; it’s that the majority of Millennials manage, at least for now, to mask its tell-tale symptoms. But, as Maria knows, if left unchecked, these red flags accumulate until they can no longer remain under the radar. Eventually, burnout’s symptoms become as glaring as a mink coat at an animal-rights demonstration; its obvious effects spill over from the workplace into personal relationships, self-image and even physical health. “‘Tantrum’ is the only word to describe my behaviour on the day my boss insisted I take forced leave,” says Maria. “A client cancelled a gig at the last minute and I totally lost it. I slammed down the phone, screamed a stream of f*cks at the top of my lungs, and didn’t come back for two days. I didn’t care what might happen. I’d stopped caring yonks ago....and not just about work.” “That’s how burnout begins. Little by little, you care less and less,” she says. “You stop feeling invested, slowly until I didn’t even really care about my friendships, my health—my entire life felt like a senseless chore,” she pauses a moment, checks her phone, smiles at some notification or message and says, “I’m lucky. I was so burnt out that I threw my name away. But I kept my job—and I still have friends.”\r\n\r\nSidestep the burnout\r\n\r\nHow to deal with year-end, high-stress situations:\r\n\r\nTALK TO YOUR BOSS\r\n\r\nThe office is running on a skeleton staff, you’re doing three jobs for the same pay and are always behind on deadlines. “Have a meeting with your boss where you ask for more support, failing which you will quit. And mean it,” says Cape Town clinical psychologist Lydia Batchelor.  \r\n\r\nEAT AND DRINK\r\n\r\n“Make a gap to eat lunch,” says Heidelberg registered dietitian Johanelle Greyling. “Just make sure you eat light food that gives you energy, such as a sandwich on multi-grain bread with a protein filling. Don’t forget to drink water throughout the day. Even a two percent drop in hydration can reduce your energy levels by 20%, according to studies.” \r\n\r\nTAKE A BREAK\r\n\r\nStep away from your desk and get out of the office! Researchers at California State-University say that even a 10-minute walk during your day instantly boosts your mood and increases energy levels for up to two hours.  \r\n\r\nDELEGATE\r\n\r\nDon’t be afraid to appear controlling.  Spell everything out to your support team. “Watch your team every step of the way and don’t wait for them to complete the entire project before you check how things are going—get them to feed back to you,’ says Batchelor. “Ensure you have additional time built into your schedule to go through what they give you and to fix errors that may have slipped in”.  \r\n\r\nSET REALISTIC GOALS\r\n\r\nYou dream big and work hard, yet another year has almost passed and you’re no closer to being your own boss. Hello, despondency. ‘Reduce your expectations,” says Durban life coach Khosi Shezi. \r\n\r\n“Set small goals for yourself and you will view your reality in a more positive light. You might not be the self-employed powerhouse you’d like to be, but you’re gaining experience that’s taking you closer to that long-term dream.”\r\n\r\nPRIORITISE\r\n\r\nYou’re offered a once-in-a-lifetime work opportunity, but your current schedule is packed. “It’s time to be super-creative in your prioritising and planning”, says Batchelor. “Not all of your tasks need the same level of effort and attention to deal, so stop sweating the small stuff! See what needs you now and what can wait until after that interview. \r\n\r\nSWITCH OFF\r\n\r\nSo much is going on that an hour off Twitter or Instagram leaves you feeling completely out of touch. “Gear down”, says psychologist Jane Dannerup, “Make a conscious choice to spend some time unplugged every day (even if it is for a short period), and you’ll find yourself more in touch with your inner self—and more attuned to what you really want to be doing.” \r\n","type":"story","field_meta_title":null,"field_meta_description":"Meet Generation Burnout, generation burnout, are you getting burnt out, how to cure a burnout, how to deal with a burnout, how to fix a burnout","field_meta_keyword":"Meet Generation Burnout, generation burnout, are you getting burnt out, how to cure a burnout, how to deal with a burnout, how to fix a burnout","image":"https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/sites/cosmo/sites/default/files/2020-02/stressgif.gif?xOjD5e6DjJOEhTquLdI4OHVgcKAlNidn","field_editory_by":null,"path":"/life/features/a19647/if-youre-reaching-burnout-heres-how-you-should-deal-it","created":"23 February 2020 ","time_created":"2020-02-23T12:00:00+05:30","field_section":"Life","field_section_url":"/life","field_content_type":"Features","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"field_first_name":null,"authorpath":null,"userPicUrl":null},{"nid":"19595","title":"Here's What Your Facebook Status Says About You","field_dek":"Could a Facebook status really decode your personality? Research conducted by the Brunel University, London, suggests that it can. Think before you post, eh?\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n \r\n","modified":"2020-02-23 06:30:01","status":"1","field_full_dek":"1. The neurotic type: That girl who’s always posting selfies with the #loveofherlife? Yep, she’s a little neurotic, alright. Researchers say she could be insecure, and her posts aren’t just about telling the world she’s in love, they’re likely a cry for validation (and may come from a deep fear of being dumped)!\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n2. The conscientious type: You’d rarely see a b*tchy post on this girl’s wall. She may post infrequently, but when she does, it will mostly be about ‘safe’ and inoffensive topics like family, close friends, children, or her boyfriend. PS: the researchers also wondered if these posts may have an underlying thread of competitiveness.\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n3. The intellectual type: People who post about art, politics, culture, or news aren’t on Facebook to make friends; they’re there to share information. The Brunel study suggests these peeps are probably more creative and open-minded than the average lot (and a great friend to follow when you want to know about a cool, new artist or big debate topic)\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n4. The extrovert type: When scientists at Brunel compared posts, they found that some people posted more than others, and mostly about their social lives (‘Had a blast at XYZ’s party’; ‘Hanging with my besties’, etc). This type uses FB to keep in touch with people—and also to network-—so don’t hesitate to use social media to reach out to them. \r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nThe narcissistic type: Everyone knows a friend who posts about her amazing new job, great achievements, or an unforgettable holiday. She’s probably a ‘Narcissist’. “This type seeks attention and admiration by boasting,” say the scientists at Brunel, and are more likely to feel good about themselves basis the ‘Likes’ their post gets.\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n \r\n","type":"story","field_meta_title":null,"field_meta_description":"Cosmopolitan, Cosmopolitan india, Cosmopolitan magazine, Cosmo, Cosmo india, social media, Facebook, Facebook status, what does my Facebook status say about me, Facebook personality, what does your facebook status say about you, facebook status personality test ","field_meta_keyword":"Cosmopolitan, Cosmopolitan india, Cosmopolitan magazine, Cosmo, Cosmo india, social media, Facebook, Facebook status, what does my Facebook status say about me, Facebook personality, what does your facebook status say about you, facebook status personality test ","image":"https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/sites/cosmo/sites/default/files/2020-02/Screen%20Shot%202020-02-19%20at%201.41.59%20pm.png?dTCK16LzScc5U6DJfeEMKvUl5kAxzwQK","field_editory_by":null,"path":"/life/features/a19595/heres-what-your-facebook-status-says-about-you","created":"23 February 2020 ","time_created":"2020-02-23T12:00:00+05:30","field_section":"Life","field_section_url":"/life","field_content_type":"Features","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"field_first_name":null,"authorpath":null,"userPicUrl":null},{"nid":"19605","title":"The 'No New Friends' Quiz You Need to Take to Find Out Your Real Squad ","field_dek":"","modified":"2020-02-18 11:44:23","status":"1","field_full_dek":"1. You have a hangover and need carbs, stat. Plan of attack?\r\n\r\n a. Max out your data plan with group-chat brunch GIFs, then wait two hours for a table for 20.\r\n\r\n b. Head to your standing res, and shun anyone who shows up with a random plus-one. \r\n\r\n c. Order in. Instructions: bring it directly to bed.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n2. You find a funny Insta meme to ‘tag your -besties’ in, so you:\r\n\r\n a. Tag your top 40, then brace for a tidal wave of notifications.\r\n\r\n b. Save it to your secret #SquadGoals Pinterest board.\r\n\r\n c. Comment #FollowBack with your dog’s personal account handle. \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n3. You be up in the club like:\r\n\r\n a. A pride of lions herded around the DJ booth, monopolising the dance floor.\r\n\r\n b. Huddled into a human Bermuda Triangle—no one gets in, no one gets out.\r\n\r\n c. Perhaps by club, you mean couch where I’m currently swaddled in my faux-fur blanket and memory-foam body pillow...\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n4. Groupon has a deal on flights to Bali and you have spare vacay days, so you:\r\n\r\n a. Book the world’s biggest Airbnb treehouse. \r\n\r\n b. Print your ’ship name on tees for when you form a beer-pong team at the airport bar. \r\n\r\n c. Buy one ticket to a jungle yoga retreat. Monkeys > people.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n5. GNO karaoke means:\r\n\r\n a. Twerking in a conga line to Sorry—just like Bieber’s viral video dance crew.\r\n\r\n b. Choreographed side-eye to anyone who tries to join in on Bad Blood.\r\n\r\n c. Making a three-part Dubsmash compilation of Sex And The City’s best dialogues in the corner.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nThe breakdown\r\n\r\nMostly As\r\n\r\nMaxed Out\r\n\r\nYou roll deep (read: cavernous). Plus, your massive crew is a package deal. The ultimate betrayal? Inviting only one of the Nehas to boozy brunch. A big group can make for an epic party, but it’s okay to pair off once in a while. Just don’t be shady—full disclosure is the way to go.  \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nMostly Bs\r\nSquad Obsessed\r\n\r\nYour girl gang seems in sync.\r\nThey know everything, even the regularity of your loo trips. You have the number down to a science, and ain’t nobody messing with your clique. Caution: don’t put all your eggs in one basket. Show some love to friends on the fringe. You might realise they’re inner-circle material.  \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nMostly Cs\r\nHappy Solos\r\n\r\nWe’ve all been there, sitting in a groutfit covered in crumbs. Everyone needs an occasional break from girl time, but blowing off your friends too often may be putting you in a rut. Swap your sweats for your big-girl pants, and make plans that involve less Netflix and more chilling IRL. \r\n\r\n \r\n","type":"story","field_meta_title":null,"field_meta_description":"Cosmopolitan, Cosmopolitan india, Cosmopolitan magazine, Cosmo, Girl gang, Squad, Squad quiz, ","field_meta_keyword":"Cosmopolitan, Cosmopolitan india, Cosmopolitan magazine, Cosmo, Girl gang, Squad, Squad quiz, ","image":"https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/sites/cosmo/sites/default/files/2020-02/114_Quiz_RR-1.jpg?YagRdYn92wPm789cxWxvAIkR_LiXXCVM","field_editory_by":null,"path":"/life/q/a19605/no-new-friends-quiz-you-need-take-find-out-your-real-squad","created":"22 February 2020 ","time_created":"2020-02-22T13:00:00+05:30","field_section":"Life","field_section_url":"/life","field_content_type":"Q & A","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"field_first_name":null,"authorpath":null,"userPicUrl":null},{"nid":"19594","title":"Uh-Oh! How the Hell Did Google Know That About Me?! ","field_dek":"Stalking, spying, and stealing contacts. Enter the scary world of online marketing that lets Google know that your dress is so last-season!\r\n","modified":"2020-02-22 06:30:01","status":"1","field_full_dek":" \r\n\r\nA few weeks ago, I went looking for a new pair of jeans online. After browsing a few sites, I couldn’t make up my mind and gave up. So far, so indecisive. But then a funny thing happened. Over the next week, I started to notice online ads for that exact pair of jeans everywhere—when I read the news, as I scrolled through blogs... even while shopping on other websites. I didn’t need more temptation to shop, but what could I do? Stalker-ish Internet ads are more ubiquitous than Miley Cyrus meme. Still if, like me, you’re starting to wonder if anything is private anymore, read on to find out exactly how you can stop leaving your electronic footprint all over the web.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nThe how and the why\r\n\r\nDo you know the square or banner adverts that sit at the top of every webpage? It’s accurate to say that they know you. Commonly known as targeting or remarketing ads, “they target your interests based on your web history and network activity,” explains Dali Kaafar, Principal Researcher and Research Leader at IT research centre NICTA, Australia. But how exactly do they work? Well, there are a few different methods, yet most commonly they use cookies to collect your data. Cookies, are small, unique files that are saved to your computer whenever you visit a website—they help that site recognise you if you’ve been there before. But often these cookies stay on your computer, tracking you long after you’ve left the site. Then, clever advertising networks use that information to try to figure out exactly the sort of adverts that are likely to appeal to you. And they are everywhere, too. “It’s estimated there are around 15 to 20 different entities tracking you per page for every popular website you visit,” says Kaafar. Creepy, huh?\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nDefence mechanisms\r\n\r\nJust ask Kiran*, 29. After deciding to start a family, she noticed her research had created a hotbed of online ads for fertility clinics in her local area. While tracking doesn’t bother her when she’s researching, say, holiday destinations, “the fact that details of my searching are actually tracked and sold bothers me for personal things,” she says. Thankfully, for people like Kiran, it is possible to tone down the tracking. “Turning off third party cookies in your browser does limit some of the external trackings,” reveals Nick Savvides, senior principal systems engineer at Symantec. He also suggests enabling the ‘do not track’ mode in your browser’s privacy settings, or opening up a new window in private browsing mode (incognito mode for Chrome) for extra secrecy. And if you find all adverts annoying? Download an ad-blocking tool such as NoScript, Ghostery or BetterPrivacy. If you are super-paranoid about data collection, it’s possible to hide your IP address (an identification number given to your computer or device by your Internet service provider) with software such as TOR, which allows you to surf anonymously. But don’t be too worried. “There is some ability to track [through your IP address], but there isn’t that much valuable information a marketer can take from it,” says Savvides. In fact, the most effective method of cutting out tracking is also the simplest: clearing your history after each surfing session and deleting any cookies.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nThe other kind of FB stalking\r\n\r\nNow for the bad news: while it may be possible to fool Google, Facebook is a trickier beast. Nikita*, 27, found this out the hard way when her status changed from ‘in a relationship’ to ‘single’ last year. “When dating websites started to appear, I found it quite offensive and somewhat degrading,” she says. “I can’t even go on Facebook without being reminded that I’m single!” Unfortunately, there isn’t a whole lot you can do to stop the adverts. “The terms and conditions for social media ask you to hand over access to your information as a trade for accessing their platforms,” says Savvides. Kaafar adds, “Facebook is probably abusing this, but this is their business model—and people agreed to be on it.”\r\n\r\nDon’t despair, though. There are encrypting tools in development, such as the Android app Yahut, which will potentially allow you to share data on social media privately. In the meantime, keeping a regular eye on your social media privacy settings is a wise move, as is disabling any Facebook apps that you no longer use.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nSmartphone? Smart tracking\r\n\r\nThe humble smartphone app is another advertising trap to be wary of. “A big problem with mobile phones is the over-privileged of apps—they often ask for more data than they actually need,” warns Kaafar. So be sure to check your phone’s privacy settings for any access to your personal data that’s unnecessary. “A photo app shouldn’t have access to your microphone, for example,” explains Savvides. Lastly, be mindful of allowing apps access to your contact list—it’s an easy way for companies to find new people to add to their directories. Hello there, irritating marketing calls. And if all else fails? You may just need to accept we live in an advertising-driven world. We may not always like them, but those targeted ads can have their benefits. If it wasn’t for that promo e-mail, I might not have scored those jeans at 20 per cent off... Oops! \r\n","type":"story","field_meta_title":null,"field_meta_description":null,"field_meta_keyword":"Cosmopolita, cosmo, cosmo india, cosmopolitan india, cosmopolitan magazine, google, google search, how did google find me, is google stalking me, ","image":"https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/sites/cosmo/sites/default/files/2020-02/ArtisticTatteredAnophelesmosquito-size_restricted.gif?dFQFpJi8KD2yg0g4sfBzpxoSsi5q862H","field_editory_by":null,"path":"/life/features/a19594/uh-oh-how-hell-did-google-know-about-me","created":"22 February 2020 ","time_created":"2020-02-22T12:00:00+05:30","field_section":"Life","field_section_url":"/life","field_content_type":"Features","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"field_first_name":null,"authorpath":null,"userPicUrl":null},{"nid":"19598","title":"PSA: Being Ambitious is a Good Thing!","field_dek":"Why is it so hard to say ‘I’m ambitious’, without apologies? We find out exactly what women want in their careers, and what’s stopping them from getting it. \r\n\r\n \r\n","modified":"2020-02-21 07:30:02","status":"1","field_full_dek":"There’s something about the word ‘ambitious’ that’s always had this negative undertone to it—club that general disdain with a woman having this particular quality? The stereotype that springs forth is a Type-A, work-addict, super-b*tch. Being the right amount of ambitious is a dangerous game, and women often feel the pressure from both ends of the spectrum. The sad thing is, ambition is paramount to a successful career—how are you likely to get to the top if you don’t have the drive to do it?  It’s ambition, will, and determination that lets you rise to the top—the position over 90 percent of all women under 30 want (according to a survey we conducted on Cosmopolitan.in). We spoke to a series of the women taking this survey and found out that they looked on the idea of running or managing something—be it anything from a law firm to a bakery—as extremely exciting, and a challenge they were truly up for. A similar survey from\r\nLeanIn.org and McKinsey and Company studied these trends in detail to better understand women’s career goals and motivation. Some see a big job as the payoff they deserve (‘I didn’t work this hard for nothing.’), others as the best way to make a difference (‘I like helping people achieve.’) and more still as having a voice in strategy. (‘When you’re not really calling the shots, you don’t really have a say in what gets done.’)  \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“The journey to the top excites me. I take every opportunity as a chance to grow, and I love having a big goal,” says Deepti Talwar, a 26-year old copywriter at an advertising firm. “I do not believe becoming a top executive is a goal for everyone. However, that is the choice we as women should get to make.” Not that our hang-ups have suddenly gone away. Women under 30 remain significantly less ambitious for the top spot than men are, the new survey finds. And although women and men begin their careers with equal aspirations, at each subsequent level, men are more interested in being promoted. This ambivalence persists for good reason. As Sheryl Sandberg—Facebook COO, Co-Founder of LeanIn.org, and Cosmo US Contributing Careers Editor—has documented, studies consistently show that aggressive women are less liked at work and that they are less likely to move up as a result. “As a woman, I feel like I am expected to be more complacent with my career and less competitive,” says Gauri Sen, a 24-year old Editorial Assistant. “I struggle to find a balance between being feminine and ambitious in an office. I want to be respected and strong, not just fun and nice.” No-one wants to ‘lean in’ to being unlikable. Workplace policies—unequal pay, inflexible hours, paltry paid leave—haven’t evolved to accommodate women’s changing ambitions either, as the American Association of University Women has tracked. Even at companies that offer flexibility programmes and many of the employers in the LeanIn.org survey do— women and men tend not to take advantage. There’s a perception it would hurt them at work. Paternity leave is offered at 44 percent of the companies surveyed, but only 1 percent of men with children under 18 participated in the last three years.  When flexibility feels like a non-option, big ambitions seem more daunting. “My hard-working parents always struggled with work-life balance, and sometimes, it felt like the balance was not in my favour,” says Laetitia, a 23-year-old law intern in New Delhi. “I definitely think it would be tough to be in that demanding executive position.” Being in charge seems exhausting whether or not you have a family. Stress and pressure is the number-one reason women say they wouldn’t want to pursue an executive role. What’s not said enough is that the top is where you can potentially control your schedule the most, and enact change for other workers too. So, it’s disappointing that women are under-represented at every level in the corporate pipeline.  India, specifically, has the worst gender gap in the world when it comes to working women. Due to safety concerns, even educated, qualified women don’t work. In urban cities and sectors, few women make it to the top of the ladder. \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n1. What is your greatest ambition?\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“To do something that inspires me—but also to be able to let my personal life and relationships grow alongside it.” —Rhea T., 27\r\n \r\n\r\n“To be the best at what I do—hands down.”  —RIMA S., 25\r\n \r\n\r\n“To have a job that lets me work at my pace, in my style, and doesn’t usurp all my time.” —vinita a., 25\r\n \r\n\r\n“To be able to be great at my job—and still manage to be a good wife and mother.” —raina d., 26\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“To be utterly indispensable to my agency.” —Shriya S., 30\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“For our organisation to become a forerunner in our field.” —sneha I., 28\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“To be an example that a woman can most certainly rise to the top.” —Devyani J., 26\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nTo be at a point in my career where no one questions my intelligence.” —Farah Z., 28\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n1. Would You Like to be Promoted from Your Current Position?  \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“Absolutely! I take my job very seriously and I put in more hours than I need to because my goal is to hit the top by the time I’m 35. I also feel no need to apologise for it.”    —priyanka c. 29, marketing manager\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“My career matters a lot—but not enough for me to go crazy and stop caring about everything else in my life. I need a balance—but I’m still trying to find it.”   —Deepti t., 26, senior copywriter\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“I’m not the kind of person who’s obsessed with getting to the top—it’s more important for me to have variety in what I do. That’s why I’d give up a well-paying position for a more interesting job that may pay less.” —Aashna H., 28, graphic designer\r\n \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n2. Do You Aspire to be a Top Executive in Your Field? \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“I see myself managing a major record label someday—and this job gives me the opportunity to familiarise myself with music and what works for audiences in a way that being at a label from the start would never have let me do.”\r\n                         —Saira k., 24,Disc Jockey\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“I’ve been in the same organisation for six years, and been promoted every year. I’m certain I will be again.” — diya J., 30, division head, sales\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“I don’t want to be CEO tomorrow, but I definitely need there to be steady growth—and to be rewarded for the work I put in.” — Mehtab P., 27, pr executive\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n3. Why Wouldn’t You Be Interested in Being a Top Executive? \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nStress and Pressure “It’s more important to me to have a certain quality of life than to be number-one ‘whatever’—I wouldn’t sacrifice that for a promotion.” —Keerti K., 26, event planner\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nTip from the top “I always left the office at 5pm to go to yoga class, and then I’d go home and check my e-mail for an hour,” says Anne Kreamer, author of Risk/Reward. “You need to get your work done, but if you are working all the time, you get brittle. Find your yoga, baking or hiking, whatever it is that gives you inner fortitude.”\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n Balancing Family and Work “I’ve always grown up wanting a family and a good work life—so my ideal job would be something that made space for that part of my life, when it happens.”—Abhaya S., 21, law student\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nTip from the top Just because you aren’t crushing it at work for a couple of years doesn’t mean you aren’t ambitious. Life happens. “The important thing is not to scale back ambitions in anticipation of conflicts that don’t yet exist,” Sandberg says. “Anyone who is lucky enough to have options should keep them open for as long as possible.”\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nI’m Not Interested “As long as I’m paid enough to live comfortably and derive a great sense of satisfaction from my job, I don’t need a fancy designation to keep my juices flowing.”—Gauri s., 24, editorial assistant\r\n\r\n\r\n“I’m more of a do-your-own-thing kind of girl than a corporate stooge.”—Hansika M., 29, stylist\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n I Don’t Think I’d Succeed “Just because I’m good at my job doesn’t necessarily mean I’m cut out for top-level management. I don’t see the need to try for something I’m doubtful about my skills at, and then fail.” \r\n\r\n—Sarika g., 27, social media analyst\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n Tip from the top “To make sure the fear of failing doesn’t stop me, I over-prepare to ensure I know my stuff cold,” says Tai Wingfield, SVP at the Centre for Talent Innovation and co-author of CTI study Black Women: Ready to Lead. “Command your subject and you’ll command the room.”\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n4. Going Forward, Do You Think Being a Woman Will Make It Harder or Easier for You to Advance in Your Career? No Effect\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“Luckily, I work at the kind of company that only really gives a sh*t about what kind of work I’m doing—my gender has absolutely no bearing in the matter.”  —Devyani J., 26, interior architect\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nWe live in an era where equality of the genders is pretty high up on the priority list—I think people would think twice now before passing me up for promotion just because I’m a woman.” — Farah Z., 28, personal banker\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n5. Why Would Being a Woman Make Advancement Harder?\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nMy Industry is Still Male Dominated “There are tonnes of great women in advertising, but it still happens to be a bit of a boy’s club. It’s not like I’m looked down on because I’m a woman at a senior level in the industry, but they're just aren’t too many of us around —Shriya S., 30, Creative director\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“Being a female lawyer in this country is still a hard feat—you don’t get taken too seriously in court, and even clients don’t trust you quite as much as they trust your male counterparts. It adds to the challenge, though.” —Laetitia d., 23, law intern\r\n\r\nBeing a female bartender is not as cute as it looks in the films—just try and remember how many you’ve seen around!” —Shamaila k., 24, mixologist\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nTip from the top The people who advise you don’t have to look like you. “Find a male sponsor!” says Kiersten Salander, Deputy Chief of Staff to the Chairman at Bloomberg, LP. “Look for someone who you feel comfortable going to for help over and over.”\r\n\r\nFamily Commitments Will Make it Hard\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“I don’t have kids right now, so it’s fairly easy for me to put in the time and mental energy that my job requires. However, I am definitely a little worried about what will happen when I have a family, and whether my career will suffer because of it.” \r\n\r\n—stuti j., 23, medical intern\r\n\r\n\r\n“I’m very dedicated to my work, and my idea of a perfect life has never really included children. I would like to have a healthy marriage, but I don’t see kids getting in the way of my job.” —Tarini U., 24, commissioning editor\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nSociety is biased\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“Things are a lot better now than they used to be for women, I’m sure. Regardless, it often becomes a task to prove you can take on as much as a man can. If you’re gentler with people, they assume you’re soft ‘because you’re a woman’. If you’re tough, people are quick to label you a b*tch, which they might not do if it was a man in question.”  —Tamanna p., 28, financial analyst\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“People at the company I work for have been mostly unbiased, but ever so often I do see people being a little dubious about giving a married woman or a woman with kids responsibilities because they wonder if she can handle it all.”—Deepika L., 26, clinical psychologist\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n“On the contrary, I work for an all-woman organisation, and we function fantastically—we’re not looked at any differently from our male-led counterpart companies.”—Sneha I., 28, Digital advertising exec.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nTip from the top Women can be saddled with ‘office housework’ and less glam projects. “If you’re picking up balls others have dropped, let them drop, and let someone else fix it,” says Lasso Bock, SVP of People Operations at Google. “This may feel worse for women. But if you’re working on something that isn’t valued, you’re wasting your time.”\r\n","type":"story","field_meta_title":null,"field_meta_description":"Cosmopolitan, cosmopolitan india, cosmopolitan magazine, cosmo, ambitious woman, female, career-oriented, is being ambitious wrong, ambition for woman, ambitious women ","field_meta_keyword":"Cosmopolitan, cosmopolitan india, cosmopolitan magazine, cosmo, ambitious woman, female, career-oriented, is being ambitious wrong, ambition for woman, ambitious women ","image":"https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/sites/cosmo/sites/default/files/2020-02/Screen%20Shot%202020-02-18%20at%2012.35.52%20pm.png?YXRaVfiNQ_Ihqkr1uzzL3Dy07vRKAZuR","field_editory_by":null,"path":"/life/features/a19598/psa-being-ambitious-good-thing","created":"21 February 2020 ","time_created":"2020-02-21T13:00:00+05:30","field_section":"Life","field_section_url":"/life","field_content_type":"Features","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"field_first_name":null,"authorpath":null,"userPicUrl":null},{"nid":"19599","title":"Here's What You Should Do If One of Your Friends Breaks the Girl Code ","field_dek":"That old saying says we’re made of sugar, spice, and everything nice—but just like everything else, there's a dark side to Girl World.\r\n\r\n \r\n","modified":"2020-02-21 07:00:02","status":"1","field_full_dek":"You’ve heard this too many times. A supposedly tight-knit squad has a GNO and they end up meeting a couple of cute guys. Flirty conversations are kicked off, and numbers are given out. It all seems harmless enough until it’s discovered that the Girl Code has been broken. What’s worse is finding out that a trusted friend has been asking your man out for dimly lit dinners, or that your chica has been making out with your ex of five years behind your back. Makes you question that unwritten, unspoken, but universally practiced set of rules we call The Girl Code. What we tend to forget, however, is that they aren’t just crimes against womanity—they’re just examples of someone being a not-so-great person. “I wouldn’t classify it as a girl thing or a guy thing,” says counsellor and coach Suzy Roxas of talktosuzyroxas.com. “It’s human behaviour. It happens across cultures, ages, gender.” To define backstabbing, cheating, lying, and simperingly sweet fakeness as exclusively female behaviour, then, would be unfair to both men and women because, given just the right reasons, we are all capable of these truly judge-worthy actions. What could be the catalyst? More often than not, the reason is competition, plain, and simple. “When someone wants something you have, they can behave in various ways to gain what belongs to you,” says Roxas, adding that reasons could be anything from the attention and affection of a man to professional success and possessions. So what’s a girl got to do when she realises she’s joined The Plastics? “Evaluate whether you really had a friendship,” recommends Roxas. “If you feel you did or do have a genuine friendship, figure out if things unravelled because of a different interpretation of events, whether you value things differently, or because of a simple misunderstanding. A sincere dialogue between two parties with the objective of understanding each other will bring better results than the goal of winning the argument.” While girl-on-girl crime, especially when it’s done because of a man, can deeply damage a relationship, getting to the heart of the matter is as important as keeping your cool. If, after discussing things maturely, like the adults that you are, you feel that competition, tearing each other down, and hidden agendas are your group’s MO, maybe it might be time to step away from the train-wreck. At the end of the day, your girls should have your back, not stab you in it.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nHere are a couple of things the greatest girlfriends know they should never, ever do!\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n1. Date Your Friend’s EX Just...don’t.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n2. Go after a guy your girlfriend is eyeing No bro is that cute.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n3. Ditch your friends for a dude Would he ditch his boys for you? Don’t think so.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n4. Lie. in general That includes whether a guy is a creep!\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n5. Put Down Another Girl To Make Yourself Look Better The truth will come out, and it will make you look worse than when you started.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n6. Tag bad pictures on purpose There’s a special circle in hell for people who do this.\r\n","type":"story","field_meta_title":null,"field_meta_description":"cosmopolitan, cosmopolitan india, cosmopolitan magazine, cosmo, girl gang, girl code, squad, girl squad, female friendship, female bond, friends, girl code, don't break the girl code ","field_meta_keyword":"cosmopolitan, cosmopolitan india, cosmopolitan magazine, cosmo, girl gang, girl code, squad, girl squad, female friendship, female bond, friends, girl code, don't break the girl code ","image":"https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/sites/cosmo/sites/default/files/2020-02/Screen%20Shot%202020-02-19%20at%201.18.03%20pm.png?Owo7wdUURHgdcf.cF2L_B6F9qaVeeGWw","field_editory_by":null,"path":"/life/features/a19599/heres-what-you-should-do-if-one-your-friends-breaks-girl-code","created":"21 February 2020 ","time_created":"2020-02-21T12:30:00+05:30","field_section":"Life","field_section_url":"/life","field_content_type":"Features","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"field_first_name":null,"authorpath":null,"userPicUrl":null},{"nid":"19645","title":"Trust Me, Your Likes Don't Define You ","field_dek":"Cosmo’s Mel Evans discovers the hidden dangers of social validation. \r\n","modified":"2020-02-21 06:30:02","status":"1","field_full_dek":"People who hit like several times a day - 52 percent born in the ’90s, 45 percent born in the ’80s, 24 percent baby boomers. \r\n\r\nSo how many likes did you get yesterday? I got 81 *swishes hair*. It was a shot of graffiti, and my most-liked Instagram post so far. Go figure. And damn, it feels good. You see, even though I’m not an ‘influencer’ or even someone with a brag-worthy number of followers, I crave the feeling that little love heart or thumbs-up brings when I refresh my feed.  \r\n\r\nBut it’s killing my vibe. And I’m far from alone: social validation is here to wrap your sense of self, in your phone and in your home. Fact: 52 percent of those who are making the Likes rain on social media are born in the ’90s, and 45 percent in the ’80s. I’m going to guess you’re one of those; I definitely am. And curating the perfect feed is hampering my efforts at being a functioning adult. Finding the exact right degree of contrast on a photo or editing a Facebook post multiple times if it doesn’t hit the right balance of wit, charm, and pizzazz I thought it did 60 minutes prior is now my life. As a writer, coming up with the perfect caption could determine whether I post a beautiful image at all, and I’ll think nothing of deleting an Instagram post altogether if I don’t get more than 10 Likes. It’s a cruel world, and I’m scrolling down the river without a paddle. \r\n\r\nThis psychological thirst for social validation ain’t new, that’s for sure. It’s always been around in one form or another, but the way it’s totally infiltrating our lives in the digital age is concerning. \r\n\r\n“We’ve always needed social approval; it’s hard-wired into our brains,” explains Melbourne-based clinical neuropsychologist Ash Nayate. “Once upon a time it was having a big house, the best car, and tonnes of great shoes. Now it’s changed and evolved to be through social media. If we put a cute picture of ourselves online, it’s going to get a lot of Likes. It’s immediate in how it triggers the reward pathways in our brain. Much the same way as food, chocolate or a text message from the person you’ve had your eye on does.”\r\n\r\nHowever, unlike the cute text you could be waiting days for, I can upload a pic right now (provided it’s post-worthy, of course) and in mere seconds I can be staring at a few Likes—dopamine achieved; endorphins riding high. Even as I type, my fingers slowly gravitate towards my phone, sitting on a pile of papers on my desk. Has someone new liked my most recent photo? Perhaps a friend has posted an ‘LOL’ on my Facebook comment. Nope. No notifications. Sad face emoji. I’ll check again in 10. \r\n\r\n“Because social media is at our fingertips and so immediate, we don’t have to rely on someone else to say nice things about us, as once was the case to achieve the same high,” Nayate says. Because who needs other people when you have your likes, right? Chumps.\r\n\r\nThe 2015 Sensis Social Media Report looked into people’s online habits and what they get up to on our social media accounts. What did they find? Exactly what you’d assume: we’re spending a sh*tload of time on these apps, looking for our next hit. It found we spend an average of eight and a half hours per week on Facebook, 45 percent of us log in as soon as we wake up and most update their accounts to keep their ‘finger on the pulse’. \r\n\r\nIn a study by authors Joseph Grenny and David Maxfield called Society’s New Addiction: Getting a ‘Like’ over Having a Life, 1,623 people were surveyed about their social media proclivities. Nearly 75 percent admitted to being rude or disconnected because they’re more focused on their phones. 91 percent have seen a tourist miss the enjoyment of a moment by trying to get it on social media—or even acknowledge doing the same thing themselves. Oh, I’ve been there (and I probably posted about it). \r\n\r\nRemember Essena O’Neill? The 19-year-old Sunshine Coast model who quit social media last year in a dramatic flurry of tears and media? She said it “ruined” her life and campaigned to change the perception we have of those popular social media accounts. “Everything I was doing was just edited and contrived to get more value and more views,” she explained in a 17-minute video declaring she was saying see-ya to social media. “If you don’t think [social media] is a business, you’re deluding yourself.” \r\n\r\nYou don’t need to be making money from the machine to earn the feel-good vibes, and the effect it has on real-world happiness is just as damaging. \r\n\r\n“Our key finding is that we enjoy these moments less when we’re focused on capturing them, rather than experiencing them,” said Grenny in his study. “Likes are a low-effort way to produce a feeling of social well-being that takes more effort to achieve in the real world. This study is a warning that we are beginning to value virtual pleasure hits more than authentic happiness.”\r\n\r\nIt becomes a constant need to activate these pleasure centers. You may have first created an account because your friends did, but what starts as a harmless post or two, fast turns into a slippery-slope of validation obsession. \r\n\r\n“The thing about a dopamine hit is that it’s very addictive,” says Nayate. “The more we get, the more we want. That’s why social media use can escalate really quickly—it might not even be something we’re conscious of.” \r\n\r\nThis social validation for the digital age is messing with the relationships big time. I can think of many a situation where I have ignored the person I’m with, be it a boyfriend or a housemate, in order to look for a #throwbackthursday (with the right mix of funny and cute) to post and wow my seven-hundred-and-something Instagram admirers. Oh, how annoying it was to feign interest in their story while at the same time encouraging my brain to nail the right hashtags to elicit Likes from randoms on the other side of the world. It’s like trying to think of a song while another plays in the background—my brain can only do so much, and often it chooses the mindless interactions of ‘social’ media over engaging in real-life, meaningful conversations with those closest to me—literally. Although I’m not proud,  I recognise it’s something I’ve got to work on. You know, to make sure I still have real-life pals this time\r\nnext year.  \r\n\r\n “Any form of online connection cannot replace a flesh-and-blood connection,” Nayate says, leaving me feeling like the worst friend in the world. “We become addicted to the rush of validation from someone else. Post something and you might get 100 or 1,000 people liking it, compared to a simple one-on-one conversation that might not be as rewarding for our neural pathways as getting those Likes. How can you say 1,000 random Likes are better than one from your best friend? Social media is taking away our ability to enjoy real-life interaction with our friends.”\r\n\r\nIn our quest for Likes, we are more connected, yet we are lonelier than ever. We long for the perfect #sunset photo to share across our networks, choosing instead to chase the picture rather than take it in. While our dinner goes cold and our partner sits alone (pissed off, no doubt), we’re filtering our food instead of tasting it. Consider that, if you will, as a wider metaphor. \r\n\r\nThink about it—how many concerts have you been to where your view of Your Favourite Band has been obscured by layers of smartphones, held aloft like weird, virtual cigarette lighters of an era past? Punters (myself included, I’ll admit) are more focused on creating the perfect Snapchat to elicit maximum FOMO than just enjoying the performance they’ve paid maximum dosh for. \r\n\r\n“We’re not enjoying things anymore,” says Nayate. “People talk about mindfulness and being present, and when we’re watching everything through our phones there is part of our mind thinking, ‘This is going to be a great shot!’”\r\n\r\nWhat’s the antidote? To\r\nrelax, says Nayate—but ideally not by scrolling through Instagram or plotting your next Facebook post. And with that advice in mind, I think it’s high time I ditched the phone, cared not for how many people are double-tapping my pics and just started looking at what’s going on around me. For as Ferris Bueller says: “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” What a great quote... I should Tweet that. \r\n","type":"story","field_meta_title":null,"field_meta_description":"You Are Not Your Likes, social media, negative impact of social media, social media problems, social media issues, problems with social media, social media problems, negative impact of social media, social media issues, you are not defined by your likes, instagram likes, how many likes should i get on instagram, how many likes make me popular, am i defined by my likes, social media negativity","field_meta_keyword":"You Are Not Your Likes, social media, negative impact of social media, social media problems, social media issues, problems with social media, social media problems, negative impact of social media, social media issues, you are not defined by your likes, instagram likes, how many likes should i get on instagram, how many likes make me popular, am i defined by my likes, social media negativity","image":"https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/sites/cosmo/sites/default/files/2020-02/Untitled%20design%20%289%29_3.png?17sE5d4SKf25_Brjlga9nl9CXvYTaug7","field_editory_by":null,"path":"/life/features/a19645/trust-me-your-likes-dont-define-you","created":"21 February 2020 ","time_created":"2020-02-21T12:00:00+05:30","field_section":"Life","field_section_url":"/life","field_content_type":"Features","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"field_first_name":null,"authorpath":null,"userPicUrl":null},{"nid":"19600","title":"8 Clever Money Hacks You *Need* to Know ","field_dek":" Cosmo Australia’s financial columnist and CEO of LearnVest, Alexa von Tobel, tells us when to go big and when to save.\r\n\r\n \r\n","modified":"2020-02-21 06:30:02","status":"1","field_full_dek":"1. Splurge On Your Haircut: For something you’re in 24-7-365, like your hair, spending a lot is worth it. Think of it in terms of cost per wear... Ditto for eyeglasses and jeans.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n2. Splurge On Phone Chargers: Best-case scenario with a cheap phone charger is that it takes forever to power up your phone. Worst-case: it damages or fries it—they tend to be poorly made.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n3. Save on...Trendy Stuff: Speaking of costs per wear, crunch the numbers before you shell out the big bucks for psychedelic-print pants and neoprene anything. If it’ll have a short shelf life, get it at Jabong or ASOS.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n4. Save on...Fitness bands: You don’t really need a high-tech fitness tracker to monitor your distance and calorie loss. As Sunalini Mathew, Deputy Editor Reader’s Digest, tells us, a free app (like MyFitnessPal and Noom Coach) does the job just as well.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n5. Splurge On Health Insurance: Budget insurance may seem like a good deal because of low monthly premiums, but you’ll pay a higher deductible before insurance chips in. Don’t settle for a bronze plan if you can afford a gold one. \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n6. Splurge On Your Mattress: You sleep on it every single night. Enough said!\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n7. Save on...Scripts: Ask the pharmacist for cheaper, generic brands instead of fancy, imported versions—especially when you’re buying vitamins.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n8. Save on...Your car: New cars lose an estimated 20 percent of their value as soon as you drive them. Buy a used one that’s less than three years old (vehicle warranties tend to expire after that).\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nCosmo Girls Offer More Tips...\r\n \r\n\r\nShruti Rai Choudhary, 28\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nSave On : Eating out, Movies, Shoes\r\n\r\nSplurge On : Vacations, Clothes, Make-up\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nBhavyaa Chopra, 22\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nSave On : Clothes, Shoes, Food\r\n\r\nSplurge On : Make-up, Fragrances, Accessories\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\nSakshi Kedia, 23\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nSave On : Clothes, Bags, Fragrances\r\n\r\nSplurge On : Lingerie, Shoes, Make-up\r\n","type":"story","field_meta_title":null,"field_meta_description":"Cosmopolitan, Cosmopolitan india, Cosmopolitan magazine, cosmo, money saving tips, money hacks, how to save money, what products should i spend my money on, splurge and save, what you should spend on, how to save money, when to spend money, tips to save money, money tricks, money tips , smart money hacks ","field_meta_keyword":"Cosmopolitan, Cosmopolitan india, Cosmopolitan magazine, cosmo, money saving tips, money hacks, how to save money, what products should i spend my money on, splurge and save, what you should spend on, how to save money, when to spend money, tips to save money, money tricks, money tips , smart money hacks ","image":"https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/sites/cosmo/sites/default/files/2020-02/Screen%20Shot%202020-02-18%20at%2012.24.17%20pm.png?vi2VQStW5DcBhEFYLfrfxjKLnr2RvK.W","field_editory_by":null,"path":"/life/features/a19600/8-clever-money-hacks-you-need-know","created":"21 February 2020 ","time_created":"2020-02-21T12:00:00+05:30","field_section":"Life","field_section_url":"/life","field_content_type":"Features","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"field_first_name":null,"authorpath":null,"userPicUrl":null},{"nid":"19643","title":"5 Things you Should Never Put Down In an Email","field_dek":"Sure, it’s cathartic to take a deep breath and pen down your angst. But it can also be akin to some pret-ty major damage...\r\n\r\n \r\n","modified":"2020-02-20 11:38:51","status":"1","field_full_dek":"It’s quick, easy and, to be honest, lets you escape dreary small-talk and avoid some awkward real-life conversations. So you can’t be blamed for wanting to use ‘hit send’ as your main form of communication. But with the efficiency of our beloved e-mail comes some serious drawbacks. We seem to have forgotten the fact that everything we send can be re-read (over and over again), forwarded, printed out and basically shown to anyone, at any time. E-mails are far from fleeting and if you say the wrong thing, especially at the wrong time, it can haunt you for a good long while. These are the five times you should step away from the keyboard—pronto. \r\n\r\n1. ‘You’re Such a Jerk!’ \r\n\r\nTyping an e-mail with your fists, in a fit of rage is never a good idea. Anger increases our stress hormones, which decrease our ability to communicate well. Remember when we’d resolve arguments face-to-face? They actually got resolved in a quick and calm manner (99 percent of the time). When you are looking someone in the eye, you’re less likely to throw as many verbal punches. Enter the world of e-mail and we get a bit of digital courage, writing harmful things we often wouldn’t say out loud. Resist the urge to vent your frustration with a quick-fire e-mail, because it’s far harder to resolve a conflict once you’ve hit ‘send’. You can’t take back a heated rant (yes, it’ll be in cyberspace forever) and chances are it’ll just fire up your recipient and escalate the feud. Before you know it, the actual reason you’re fighting will get lost in the crossfire and a resolution will just drift further and further away. If you can’t meet face-to-face, pick up your phone and tell them why you’re feeling upset. They’re much more likely to respond with empathy to your actual voice. \r\n\r\n2. ‘You’re the Dirtiest Housemate Ever’\r\n\r\nJust as feuding via e-mail is a big no-no, so is criticising someone. We get a false sense of bravado behind the screen and say things we’d never have the courage to say in person. It’s always a daunting task to tell someone they’re doing something wrong, but there are some tactful ways to do it, and e-mail just isn’t ever going to be one of them. \r\n\r\nFor starters, your recipient can read what you wrote over and over again, and continue to feel hurt or even ashamed by it. They’ll pull every sentence apart and read into every little word and exclamation mark (we’ve all done it, and it’s exhausting). Chances are, they’ll also read it in a different tone to how it was meant and see it as a personal attack. Being honest is a very important part of any relationship so, by all means, go forth and speak the truth—to their face. Then you can ensure the other person hears your critique in the most positive way. If you speak in a polite and friendly way, without expressing any anger and hostility, they’re less likely to jump to the defence. It also gives them a chance to raise any other issues they may want to address with you. Because nobody’s perfect...\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n3. ‘I Can’t Make It Tonight’\r\n\r\nIf you have to cancel dinner plans, a date or any other commitment, making a call is a simple act of courtesy that shows you genuinely care about and have respect for the relationship. E-mailing them a wordy reason for why you need to cancel can also come across as a cop-out and a lie. Pick up the phone. \r\n\r\n4. ‘I’m Sorry’ \r\n\r\nAs we previously mentioned, nobody’s perfect, and you’re bound to stuff up plenty. But don’t dig yourself a deeper hole by e-mailing an apology. It’s the cowardly option. No one enjoys the awkwardness of a hard conversation, but it’s always best to face up to your mistakes. Saying sorry in person shows sincerity and humility that an e-apology seriously lacks. If you’re after forgiveness, you’re far more likely to get it face-to-face than in writing. \r\n\r\n5. ‘I Really Need an Answer Urgently’\r\n\r\nNothing’s more efficient than simply picking up the phone if you need something right this minute. It’s far harder for someone to ignore a ringing phone than an e-mail, which arrives in an inbox among dozens (or even hundreds) of other unread messages. Even if yours is read, it can easily be forgotten or put aside for later. On the phone, it’s also much harder for someone to avoid a question (no matter how tough) and you’ll get an immediate response even if it’s not necessarily the one you were hoping for.      \r\n","type":"story","field_meta_title":null,"field_meta_description":"5 things you should never put in an email, 5 email mistakes, cosmo india, cosmopolitan india, cosmoplitan.in, cosmo, cosmo magazine, cosmo online, email problems, dont put this down on email, how to write a formal email, how to write an email, how to write an email to my boss, 5 email mistakes, dont write this in an email ","field_meta_keyword":"5 things you should never put in an email, 5 email mistakes, cosmo india, cosmopolitan india, cosmoplitan.in, cosmo, cosmo magazine, cosmo online, email problems, dont put this down on email, how to write a formal email, how to write an email, how to write an email to my boss, 5 email mistakes, dont write this in an email ","image":"https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/sites/cosmo/sites/default/files/2020-02/Untitled%20design%20%289%29_1.png?iHJcFI0wDk5qmJRbsaow917RNcFiBJmR","field_editory_by":null,"path":"/life/features/a19643/5-things-you-should-never-put-down-email","created":"20 February 2020 ","time_created":"2020-02-20T17:05:00+05:30","field_section":"Life","field_section_url":"/life","field_content_type":"Features","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"field_first_name":null,"authorpath":null,"userPicUrl":null},{"nid":"19639","title":"Does She Deserve to Be Hated?","field_dek":"Islamophobia, especially towards young Islamic women, is on the rise. Tanya Gold goes undercover to find out why.\r\n","modified":"2020-02-20 06:30:02","status":"1","field_full_dek":"Here I am, walking through London, wearing my veil. I have seen devout Muslim women wear it and I am fascinated by it. I want to try to understand how they feel, to walk in their shoes. I have worn it for three days and on this last day, in the high street in Dagenham, East London, I feel genuinely afraid. People—women—are abusing me as I pass and laughing into their hands; if it were night, I would fear for my physical safety. Everything I thought I knew about being a woman in this glittering neon city is wrong. Muslim women are frightened—and they are right to be. Islamophobia, globally, is on the rise. A study by gallup.com indicates that 52 percent of Western countries surveyed had an unfavourable opinion of Islam [while in India, a consensus of findings by multiple faith-based agencies, taken to a hearing to the US Commission for International Religious Freedom (USCIRF), showed that attacks on minorities (Muslims in particular) had gone up since 2014—with 150 attacks on them taking place since then]. The refugee crisis and the rise of the ISIS means that—for bigots—Muslim women are a target. Austerity policies have not helped because racism flourishes with economic insecurity. The day before I am due to go out for this feature, a Muslim woman is attacked outside her university in Central London. Her veil is ripped from her face. I want to investigate the experiences of women like them—and my own prejudice—because I have always hated the veil and seen it as a tool of oppression.\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nMy first call is to Sajda Mughal, a winner at last year’s Cosmopolitan UK Ultimate Woman Awards and director of the JAN trust, a charity supporting vulnerable ethnic-minority women. “It’s gotten worse”, she says. “In the last three years alone, we have seen a 65% rise in the number of women coming to us and telling us of their suffering.” Veiled women she says “have been spat at, slapped, and hit. Perpetrators have tried to pull off their veils on buses, in the streets.” The youngest victim she has worked with was seven; she was told at school that “your father is Osama bin Laden”. She has heard of ambulance workers refusing to transport women in headscarves and social workers telling children their native lands are “terrorist countries”. She herself has been threatened. One telephone message said, “I want to slit your Muslim throat.” Those responsible, she says, are almost always white men. She says she has never met a veiled woman who doesn’t wear it by choice. Perhaps it’s comforting for women like me to believe they are coerced into wearing it by their families. Is that my form of racism? Do I not trust these women to make their own choices? I order a dress from Amazon: it is ‘modest’, Saudi-style. When it arrives, my husband says it is more revealing than some of my clothes, so I order a second one, but I’ve forgotten to buy the veil. I stop a Muslim woman in my street and ask her where to buy one; I lie and say I am visiting Saudi Arabia. She says I do not need to explain and sends me to Shepherd’s Bush Market in London. I buy the veil and niqab (the part that covers the face). Leaving the market, I catch reflection of my sight and am shocked. I look like nothing; like a backdrop or a wall. I jump into a Costa Coffee; it is familiar, but I think there is less warmth in the server’s eyes than is usual. She seems brusque, efficient, keen to get it over with. I have no excuse to stay here, although I want to. I want to hide in the toilet, invent the article, go home. Outside, I pass another woman in a veil. “As-salamu ‘alaykum”, she says, a common Muslim greeting meaning ‘peace be upon you’. I am desperately grateful; even so, I feel ashamed. My sisterhood with her— which she so sweetly acknowledges— is a pretense. The veil does not always bring peace. Sajda told me of three women she has worked with. One took her daughter, aged two, to a playground. A white man shouted “terrorist b*tch” and “f*ck off out of my country, ISIS b*tch”. (He obviously didn’t know ISIS mostly terrorise other Muslims.) He ordered his dog to attack them. She went to the police. They did nothing. Her child screamed every night for months.The second woman she talks about was on the bus to pick her toddler up from nursery. A young white man called her a “terrorist” and an “ugly b*tch” who should “get out of my country” because “you people just breed terrorists”. Instead of helping her, other passengers applauded. The bus driver did nothing. She stopped crying when she got to the nursery; she did not want to frighten her child. A third woman was walking in a town centre and heard a man say “terrorist”. He said “go back to your country”, and, “You must be ugly, that’s why you’re wearing that thing.” He ripped her veil off and threw it on the ground. She still has nightmares—that he is killing her. On my first day in the veil, I catch a bus to Hammersmith in west London. I am uncomfortable. I dribble on my veil. Normally, I am over-friendly with strangers. I say hello to bus drivers. I accost women with babies. Today I do not want to. I feel immobile and isolated; I feel I can do nothing right. I get off and see, on the time table, a bus to Teddington, where I spent my early childhood. Of course, I’m seeking places where I am deeply rooted; where I feel safe. I look for the stop, and something happens to surprise me. A man runs over and says, “Can I help you?” He takes me to the stop. This is the other side then: concern. The solicitude. Maybe the pity? On the bus, I can’t read because my glasses slide off the veil. If I put them inside, the fabric stretches and cuts into me and I look absurd, like an owl. I can’t eat as I would have to raise the cloth, which I am beginning to feel a strange loyalty to because it is, for now, the identity I have chosen, and all I have. If I am to wear it, I will wear it properly; I will not defame it. I can’t make conversation because I am afraid of the response. I am silenced. I get off at Teddington, and walk up the high street. I am no longer sure why I came here because whatever I am looking for my tiny self, I suppose—it is no longer here. It is just a suburban street on a sunny day. I feel tired, although it is only lunch time; the black polyester draws in heat. The veil prickles against my eyelashes. In Marks & Spencer, people seem more careful than usual to barge into me. A young, pretty saleswoman in Boots gives me a warm, penetrating look. Two people in the street—white, in their 50s—glare and step back. I take another bus to Kingston, where the number of Islamophobic attacks doubled in the past year. I walk around the Saturday market, then go back into Costa Coffee. I feel a low hum of hostility. People look me up and down, and look aghast or angry. One man—young, redhead— gives me a stare of pure hatred. He moves closer to me, holding it as long as possible, so I know he hates me. I go to central London on the train, and take the Underground home. The train is fine because it is empty, but the Underground is not. I receive many angry glances, and some cross murmurs, so I am relieved to return to Camden Town. Many women are veiled in my street. I fit in, as always. On the second day, I go to central London again. A few women pull their children away from me in Hamleys; maybe they think I would trip on them? But then a salesman at Zara talks to me with such bouncing sweetness and enthusiasm I am thrilled. He sees me looking at a handbag, and picks it up to show me. He doesn’t seem to notice the veil at all; perhaps consumer capitalism has no prejudices. So far my experience is nothing like those of the women Sajda told me about. But I want to know what it’s like for a woman who, through commitment to her culture alone, is obliged to feel fear. And so, before I hang up my veil, I go to Dagenham, east London. It is a declining manufacturing town with a history of racism. In 2006, the BNP won 12 council seats—although they lost them all in 2010—and 14% of the total vote. As I get off the Tube, I feel hostility immediately. It crackles in the air. I ask a taxi driver: is this the high street? “Yes,” he says with his face full of loathing. I walk up and down the street. I see women in headscarves, but no one is veiled.\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n  \r\n\r\nSoon an elderly white woman says to me, almost conversationally, as if talking about the weather, as I pass, “That’s disgusting.” Next a man in a van stops and makes a phone sign with his hand. “Oi!” he shouts, “Can I have your number?” His friends laugh. I could say he is treating me as he would any woman, and it is what passes for charm in his eyes, but I don’t think so. It is a taunt. Another elderly white woman says, “You’ve got a nerve.” Next a group women sitting outside a café laugh loudly as I pass; I hear them talk about me, their laughter tinkling across the pavement. I do not know how I would feel if I had my two-year-old with me, and could not tear off my veil and shout, “I’m not a Muslim”. Petrified probably. Then a man—again, white and elderly—shouts into my face “Ratbag!” It is such a silly insult, I almost laugh, but what would come next? All these interactions took place in just five minutes in sunlight in a crowded street. In 2013, a disabled Iranian refugee called Bijan Ebrahimi was beaten to death in Bristol, and his body set alight. The police ignored his pleas for help in the days leading up to his murder and even arrested him. I understand now how this happened. I still hate the veil. But after three days of wearing it, I no longer think it is my response to it that matters. What matters is the fear women feel, when they should not, and the violence lurking in our cities. I thought I knew about misogyny. I was wrong.” \r\n\r\nThe Burqa around the world: How different countries police the veil.\r\n\r\n\r\n\tFrance In 2011, France became the first European country to outlaw burqas in public. Then-president Nicolas Sarkozy called the women wearing them “prisoners behind a screen”. Soon after, Belgium followed suit.\r\n\tIndia Wearing the burqa is completely accepted. Being a staunchly secular democracy with a Muslim population of 176 million (14 percent of the country), there is no bar on Muslim women choosing to—or not choosing to—wear one.\r\n\tSaudi Arabia One of the only Muslim-majority countries that legally enforces a dress code in public. Almost all Muslim women wear a headscarf, and showing even an elbow has been verboten since the country’s founding.\r\n\tUSA Women can wear burqas wherever they want, thanks to the Founding Fathers who included clothing in the constitutional rights to freedom of speech. The burkini is especially popular on beaches in the summer.\r\n\r\n","type":"story","field_meta_title":null,"field_meta_description":"cosmo, cosmpolitan, cosmopolitan india, cosmopolitan.in, cosmo.in, burqa, women in burqa, veiled women, islamophobia, hating islam ","field_meta_keyword":"cosmo, cosmpolitan, cosmopolitan india, cosmopolitan.in, cosmo.in, burqa, women in burqa, veiled women, islamophobia, hating islam ","image":"https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/sites/cosmo/sites/default/files/2020-02/Screen%20Shot%202020-02-19%20at%201.40.56%20PM.png?PMtYxSkiiEKWWyv4AoO_U22MOuS91tWs","field_editory_by":null,"path":"/life/features/a19639/does-she-deserve-be-hated","created":"20 February 2020 ","time_created":"2020-02-20T12:00:00+05:30","field_section":"Life","field_section_url":"/life","field_content_type":"Features","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"field_first_name":null,"authorpath":null,"userPicUrl":null},{"nid":"19641","title":"Is Your Food Lying to you?","field_dek":"Do food labels confuse the sh*t out of you? We decode cryptic claims to sort fat from fiction.\r\n \r\n","modified":"2020-02-19 14:01:12","status":"1","field_full_dek":"Organic\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nBuying foods produced without chemicals such as pesticides and fertilisers, where possible, is good (because #cleaneating). But just because food is organic doesn’t automatically make it nutritious. “Organic foods still have the same amount of fat or calories as non-organic versions, it’s just that they might have been grown in a more sustainable manner,” explains Kate Gudorf, an accredited practicing Dietician and Spokesperson for the Dieticians Association of Australia.\r\n\r\nDiet Or Sugar-Free\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nSugar-free’ can often be misleading. Sugar can be replaced with syrups and other sweet ingredients. So, technically it is ‘sugar-free’, but really it’s just filled with sugar by another name. Ingredients to look out for are honey, maple syrup, corn syrup, barley malt, fructose, glucose, dextrose, and fruit juice concentrate. And manufacturers often split them up so the ingredients are placed lower down on the list, so instead of 15g sugar, they’ll have 5g corn syrup, 5g fructose, and 5g barley.\r\n\r\nUnrelated Claims\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nSome facts might be true, but often, they’re irrelevant. For example, that cholestrol-free oil you’ve been buying? Yes, it is cholestrol-free, but guess what? So are all olive oils. Likewise, “gluten-free claims on products such as rice crackers, which are gluten-free anyway,” says Sarah Court, Commissioner for the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission. And what’s frustrating is that these brands often charge a premium for the seemingly premium product.\r\n\r\nPercent Less Fat\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nDiscovering that your faves now have 25 percent less fat could be the greatest thing you’ve heard all year. Sadly, that doesn’t make them healthy. It all lies in what Gudorf calls the ‘reference food’—what they’re being compared with. A lot of these reference foods are really high in fat, meaning the ‘25 percent less fat’ option isn’t necessarily that much healthier, explains Gudorf. And watch out for food claiming to be fat-free. Often it’s just got added sugar to create flavour.\r\n\r\nFree Range\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nThere is no one set free-range standard in India. “To meet the demand for free-range eggs, many farmers removed the cages but left the stocking density the same, meaning the chickens could barely move around,” says Court. (Yes, this still counts as free range.) In India, Happy Hens Farm, located at a two-hour drive from Bengaluru, became the first Indian producer to label its eggs as ‘free-range’, as an indication of their hens’ high welfare and space allowances.\r\n\r\nTicks And Seal\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nMost of the badges that you see on food packaging, such as the ‘FSSAI’ (Food Safety and Standards Authority of India) logo, require a product to meet some particular health standards in order to use that sign. Some producers, however, create their own ticks and seals to trick you into thinking it’s legit or to make you associate it with one of those proper ticks or seals. If it looks a bit iffy or you haven’t seen it on your products before, don’t trust it—but Google it.\r\n\r\nThe Truths\r\n\r\nYou’re probably wondering whether you can trust anything you see on food labels. Well, you can, if you know what to look for. \"Buy LOW-FAT,  LOW-SUGAR,  REDUCED  SALT AND HIGH-FIBRE\". “These food claims are usually good because they’re regulated,” explains Gudorf. “If a product says it’s low-fat, it’s indeed low fat.” It’s still worth taking a look at the sugar content, though, in case it’s been jacked up. Read The nutritional information panel. Okay, so nobody’s really got time to read the label on every box or jar every single time, but do it once and you can just keep buying the same products. \r\n\r\nEnergy: Look at the number of calories per serving, and opt for the product with the lower amount. \r\n\r\nSaturated fat: As a rule, the closer to zero, the better.\r\n\r\nSugar: Keep sugar below 10g per 100g. For flavoured yoghurt or cereal, keep it under 15-20g. \r\n\r\nSalt: Below 400mg per 100g is a good amount. Watch out for preserved meats and canned foods as the salt content of these can be particularly high.\r\n","type":"story","field_meta_title":null,"field_meta_description":"is your food lying to you, food labels, food, labels, packaged foods, diet, healthy diet, are food labels a farce, cosmo india, team cosmopolitan, cosmopolitan india, cosmo india, cosmopolitan, cosmopolitan team, cosmo team, cosmo, food, unhealthy food, fast food, what not to eat","field_meta_keyword":"is your food lying to you, food labels, food, labels, packaged foods, diet, healthy diet, are food labels a farce, cosmo india, team cosmopolitan, cosmopolitan india, cosmo india, cosmopolitan, cosmopolitan team, cosmo team, cosmo, food, unhealthy food, fast food, what not to eat","image":"https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/sites/cosmo/sites/default/files/2020-02/giphy-1.gif?CJfwQTurd8x_rhN5e297lGT9fPiq5Kst","field_editory_by":null,"path":"/life/features/a19641/your-food-lying-you","created":"19 February 2020 ","time_created":"2020-02-19T19:30:00+05:30","field_section":"Life","field_section_url":"/life","field_content_type":"Features","notes":null,"notes_syn":null,"userData_node":null,"userData":null,"field_first_name":null,"authorpath":null,"userPicUrl":null}],"seodata":{"title":"Life - Fashion, Hair & Beauty, Career, Health, and Relationships :: Cosmopolitan India","description":"Cosmopolitan is the lifestylist for millions of fun fearless females who want to be the best they can in every area of their lives, with information on relationships and romance, the best in fashion and beauty, as well as what's happening in pop culture and entertainment.","keyword":"Fashion, Hair & Beauty, Career, Health, and Relationships"},"isSSR":false,"ttl":1582557803844},"https://www.cosmopolitan.in/api/menu/":[{"key":"9f4a441f-5d6b-4b68-a684-c9f8168c03a2","title":"Beauty","path":"/beauty","uri":"","alias":"","external":false,"absolute":"","weight":"0","expanded":false,"enabled":true,"uuid":"","options":[],"meta_title":"Beauty","meta_description":"","meta_keyword":""},{"key":"527eea31-5a53-4f8a-849e-ef18dbbdec00","title":"Celebrity","path":"/celebrity","uri":"","alias":"","external":false,"absolute":"","weight":"0","expanded":false,"enabled":true,"uuid":"","options":[],"meta_title":"Celebrity","meta_description":"","meta_keyword":""},{"key":"5d1004a4-3fc4-45f3-904b-9208acc30f1a","title":"Fashion","path":"/fashion","uri":"","alias":"","external":false,"absolute":"","weight":"0","expanded":false,"enabled":true,"uuid":"","options":[],"meta_title":"Fashion","meta_description":"","meta_keyword":""},{"key":"91db078b-4663-4795-80fd-42eccce02561","title":"Life","path":"/life","uri":"","alias":"","external":false,"absolute":"","weight":"0","expanded":false,"enabled":true,"uuid":"","options":[],"meta_title":"Life","meta_description":"","meta_keyword":""},{"key":"5aaab124-5d5f-4d0f-ac04-d4b74bdd4f14","title":"Relationships","path":"/relationships","uri":"","alias":"","external":false,"absolute":"","weight":"0","expanded":false,"enabled":true,"uuid":"","options":[],"meta_title":"Relationships","meta_description":"","meta_keyword":""}]}
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All the Whacky Things Alia, Ranbir and Varun Do to Get Lucky!

*Knocks on wood thrice*

Black cars, red mail trucks, and pillows facing a particular direction or a tub of popcorn!

These are not the lyrics of a Lil Pump song but a few of the bizarre superstitions in Bollywood.

Actor Sonam Kapoor seems to have inspired her friends and family to reveal their lucky charms or just quirky superstitions aka ‘The Zoya Factor’ in time for the movie that releases Friday. With the Saturn, Mercury retrogrades as well as Friday 13th well behind us, if you are still feeling a little under the weather, check out these celeb-approved talismans to get some blessings headed your way.

Alia Bhatt

Remember when Paulo Coelho, and later Shah Rukh Khan in Om Shanti Om, said - When you want something, the entire universe conspires in helping you to achieve it? Well, turns out Alia truly stands by this law of attraction.

[instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2eI6Jpj3dq/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram]

Ranbir Kapoor

Meanwhile, Ranbir has more of a car-enthusiast approach towards talismans. His lucky wheels? 3 black cars, a red postal truck and of course, his mom Neetu Kapoor's birth date. 

[instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2eN_epg1Du/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram]

Varun Dhawan

Bollywood’s very own lucky-charm, Varun Dhawan, has a lucky routine that is hands-down the best on this list! Well, it does involve a tub of caramel popcorn at PVR, to say the least.

[instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2gK446FDAz/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram]

Twinkle Khanna

Mrs Funnybones does not think of messing the Vastu of your bedroom as a laughing matter. And, her son, Aarav, found out the hard way!

[instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2gr7IIF8Vh/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram]

Arjun Kapoor

While Arjun may be winning Instagram with his adorable #Throwback posts about his sisters, it may be a tad difficult for him to follow his lucky ritual involving remote controls, one of the biggest bone of contention among siblings.

[instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2gcJ9phvzV/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram]

Lastly, Karan Johar

Like a wise owl, KJo has *mic drop* talisman to end all lucky charms - self-belief! After all, isn't it easier if you are your own lucky charm?

[instagram]https://www.instagram.com/p/B2gdJN0FfkQ/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading[/instagram]