Does it matter if you have your first relationship later in life?

Movies and TV shows have tainted our understanding of the 'first relationship'. Many of us have come to believe first relationships are typically associated with high school and sweet sixteens—all the sneaking away from class to run to the dingy make-out spot or the eagerly awaited cheesy ‘prom-posals’ that seem like the ultimate goal. I had my first relationship at the age of 16, and it was filled with butterflies in all the right places along with the never-ending drama that first relationships usually ensue, but many of my friends didn’t. 

Anxiety around relationships at a specific age is a common topic of conversation. We understand that in our teenage years, hormones run crazy and romantic encounters seem to be the ultimate goal. However, be rest assured that this is not always the case and neither is it the ideal one and there are several reasons for it. First off, in our tender teenage years, most people are trying to figure out other people, different sexualities, and more importantly, themselves. It’s a crucial time for character building and major changes in our bodies, thinking, and understanding of what we want. The next, confidence, is really the key to most things, but it tends to fluctuate when experiencing classic teenage hurdles like change of school, change of friends, and change in appearances. It may not be the time to let someone else in.. for everyone at least. 

We are made to believe that the early twenties are “late” for your first relationship, but the truth is, there are enough people who have not had their first relationships even in their early thirties! Age does not mean much when you look at it in the larger scheme of things. Yes, it is true that when you experience all the hiccups of relationships earlier in life, you are more equipped going forward, but learning never ends. There is often a right time for everything and everyone, and it is almost never the same for two individuals. I have observed that those who have gotten into their first relationship around the age of 21, tend to be unfamiliar with the 'getting over' process and often feel more lost than those who have done it before. The truth is, there is no right way; everyone’s experiences and coping mechanisms are different. It is important to embrace the situation you are in and do the best you can in it.

Interestingly, a lot of parents get tired of waiting as they watch their children grow up without a significant other. However, it is imperative to understand that every child is different and each one has their own path to follow. There is no right or wrong time to start dating. It is essential to understand the emotional maturity and sense of responsibility in yourself and the other person, before pursuing something. Definitely, the age at which you get into your first relationship could matter, but it should not. Every individual has to understand that we are not in a race, and that sometimes things may work out for someone else and not you, but soon enough, other things will fall into place for you! Good things definitely take time, and I’m sure you’re worth the wait.