AGE 11
Omg he just, like, put his mouth on mine. I don't know if it was good, but it happened.
AGE 13
It's 8 p.m. and Sara's parents are out of town and apparently we're going to play this game called Truth and Dare. Crap, the bottle's pointing at me, DARE! And now I've to be locked in the bathroom with him for 10 minutes. He's OK, I guess, oh shit, now we're kissing.
AGE 15
Do I use my tongue?
AGE 16
OK, I get that I use tongue, but how exactly am I supposed to do that? What he's doing feels gross.
AGE 17
I completely have this kissing thing figured out, what with having kissed all of… 5 guys at this point. I could just kiss for hours and hours and do nothing else and still feel AMAZINGG.
AGE 18
I've made out with, like, 15 people at this party and I don't care because no parents, woooooooo!
AGE 20
OK, so I wanted to make out with Ro but he's, like, all over the place with Nat right now, so I think I'll go to a few parties tonight and see if I meet any new people I could make out with. Honestly, the world is full guys who make the make out cut and probably will be for the rest of my life because I am young and fabulous!
AGES 21-22
[A series of sloppy drunk hook ups I kinda remember and from what I recall, I regret them.]
AGES 23-24
I actually want to be in a real relationship. I think I need to show maturity and dignity. That said, I would put my face on any one of my office coworkers and what the hell, I probably will before I quit.
AGE 25
You know what? I am so sick of just sitting next to someone and we both know we want to make out with each other. Enough of this shit man. Next time, I'm just gonna go for it in this situation. OK, the next next time. Like, the one after that.
AGES 26-28
I want to make out with you, so here's my face on your face. I don't have time to wait for sweet talk or whatever move you thought you were going to make at some point. Let's be honest dude, you have no moves.
AGE 29
When we kiss, I want it it to be passionate and it should mean something, but since that's not going to happen, let' skip it and have sex. Who cares.
AGE 30
God, making out with you is just the best. I could make out with JUST YOU for the rest of my life and be completely happy. Wait, is that what love is? Cool.