“This is the First Time I Am Living In the Present!”: Radhika Apte

She landed in the British capital just days before the lockdown was imposed in India, and has been having, in her words, “a not-so-bad time”. It is worth mentioning here that at the time of this interview, London’s lockdown restrictions had been relaxed, with the city’s public transport functioning again, and more residents getting back to work. And with the weather getting warmer, some Londoners had ventured out for a bout of sunshine and exercise, while following the government’s rules of staying safe and practising social distancing.  

For Radhika, though, London isn’t just about the sights and sounds. It is her part-time home, where she spends half the year, to be with her husband, violinist and composer, Benedict Taylor. 

We arrange to conduct this interview over a Skype call, and Radhika has just returned after cycling around the block. “How are things in India?” is the first thing she asks me. She already knows, of course. And then, “The situation around the world is really, really bad...so many people have lost their jobs, economies are crashing, people are starving, many don’t have the money or the means to go home... Things are bad, but I think we are too privileged to even begin to complain.”

We are both silent for a moment, as we think about what she has just said. Then I ask her what she’s thinking, how she’s feeling right now. 

“I’m thinking that it is interesting how something like this can lead to the complete collapse of everything mankind has worked so hard to build,” Radhika says. “But I also think this time-out has given us time to do a lot of other things in life—the truth is, we’ve all been too busy and constantly distracted to be able to truly focus on anything in our lives. It’s really made me think...I’ve been working constantly for the last few years, and it just feels like I’ve never had the time to do the things I really want to in life, you know?” 

Radhika continues, “I remember when I came to London some weeks ago, the stores were running out of Marmite [a food spread that’s popular in England], so I bought another bottle. And that bottle just got over, and it made me realise that I haven’t seen anything go from start to finish—like a full jar turn into an empty one—I don’t know how many years have gone by this way! Not even a toothpaste! Because I’m either at home in India, or in a hotel room, or in London, or at somebody else’s house...

There are just so many things to think about...so many personal issues. We keep finding distractions to avoid the real issues in our lives, and now we finally have the chance to see them. But again, I’m speaking from my privileged point of view. And also, being in London has been a blessing because the lockdown here is different. There are lots of green spaces to go to and exercise, walk, and cycle. So yeah, I can’t complain. The weather’s been good, too...” 

Speaking of the weather, Radhika has been spending some time outdoors thanks to a hobby she has recently taken up—cycling. “I started cycling because of the lockdown—my friends encouraged me to,” she reveals. “And now I can cycle for about 20-25 kms easily!” She smiles triumphantly. 

For her remotely-shot covershoot for Cosmo India, the bicycle in question makes a conspicuous appearance. “I enjoyed creating these images,” she says. “At first, it felt like a lot of responsibility. I was like, ‘Oh God, what do I do?!’. But then, when I got down to it, it was rather relaxed. I just wore my own clothes, did my own hair and make-up and there was no ‘right lighting’ to worry about...just bright sunlight. So, yeah, it was really quick and easy. Luckily, we stay with a lot of artists and my housemate is a photographer so it was really convenient.” Doing her own make-up was not a problem, she reveals, because she does that “all the time”.

“Actors are trained to do their own make-up,” she says. “And the shoot was done in my backyard and outside the house, so there was no-one around.” I tell her that I love all the photographs she took for Cosmo, but my favourite is the one of her taking out the trash. “In the beginning, I loved the ‘garbage shot’ , too,” she nods, “but then, when I saw the pictures, I really liked the one where I am sitting on the pavement with a watermelon slice. I ate that entire watermelon after I was done!”

 While London’s lockdown policy now allows for limited social interaction, with specific distancing rules, Radhika has been spending this spare time with herself and those she feels closest to—her mom, Benedict, and “a few, very close friends”.  She tells me that the only people she really misses are family members...and her dogs. Oh, and enjoying a meal at a cafe. “I want to be able to go a cafe again...and I want to have a coffee and a croissant. I really miss eating out,” she laughs.

Realisation and Creative Direction: Zunaili Malik; Photographs: Keir Laird