Yes, gossiping makes you smarter! We have proof

“You're not gonna believe what I just found out!”

“Guys, I have some tea...”

“OMG, you have to hear this!”

Sound familiar? We’ve all said something like this at some point in our lives. Yes, that’s gossip. And for many of us, it’s practically instinctive, and something that helps us connect with people around us—our friends, our peers, colleagues, pretty much anyone we cross paths with (granted, we gel well with them). And before you go about screaming, "Oh, not me!" I'm calling you out. We all do it. It slips out mid-brunch, over DMs, or during that “five-minute” smoke break that somehow turns into a 30-minute rant about someone you hate or just know about. You can call it sharing facts or news updates, but if you're talking about someone to someone else, trust me, you're gossiping.

Now everyone gossips—men, women, strangers in a train, people at work, that one colleague who “doesn’t like drama”. The only difference? Women have been unfairly shamed for it, as if we’re the only ones keeping the rumour mill spinning. But here’s the twist: gossiping isn’t just a guilty pleasure—it’s social intelligence in action. Yup, the science says so.

Don't believe us? Well, here are some facts. 

The science of “spill-the-tea”

From an evolutionary perspective, gossip also serves a serious purpose: maintaining group cohesiveness. A computational simulation study by University of Maryland and Stanford researchers showed that gossip spreads reputational information and discourages selfish behaviour. The trick? Gossip works best when it’s accurate. And your brain loves gossip. Sharing it lights up your reward centre; it's the same one that goes off when you eat chocolate or scroll through your crush’s new post (don’t lie, you’ve done it).

The good, the bad, and the necessary

Let’s be real, not all gossip is evil, okay? There’s a world of difference between swapping notes on who’s dating whom and a full-blown reputation assassination. The first one actually brings people closer, while the second burns bridges. Most gossip, according to psychologists, isn’t about being shady; it’s just our brains trying to make sense of the social world. Even juicy stories can build trust and empathy. In fact, a Scientific American study found that sharing gossip can actually make people like you more. Who knew spilling tea could make you BFFs? Just kidding, us girls already knew that! 

Gossip’s also a group service. It tells us what’s cool, what’s cringe, and who to avoid (you know, community notes, but IRL). But malicious gossip? Hard pass. You must spill tea responsibly.

Gossip also does a bit of social housekeeping. By talking about what’s cool and what’s not, we’re kind of reinforcing the unspoken rules of how to act, and warning each other about red flags. Think of it as a crowd-sourced moral compass. But, of course, there’s a dark side. Malicious or false gossip can snowball into bullying, social exclusion, or even wreck someone’s mental health. So yeah, gossip can connect, protect, and teach, but it’s all about balance. Spill the tea, but maybe know when it’s time to put the kettle down.

And if you're still struggling to walk the fine line between being informed and being unkind, here are a few markers to help you. 

Keep your intention in check

Are you sharing to connect or to criticise?

Fact-check the tea

If you don’t know whether it’s true, maybe don’t say it like it is.

Don’t make it personal

Avoid speculating about things that could genuinely hurt someone.

Know when to stop

The most socially intelligent people know when to close the tab.

At the end of the day, gossiping is just how humans connect, make sense of the chaos, and occasionally entertain ourselves. It’s not the act, it’s the intention. So next time someone says, “Ugh, I hate gossip,” smile, sip your coffee, and let them think they’re above it. You know better—it’s not about the tea, it’s about how tastefully you pour it.

Lead image credit: Getty Images 

Also read: The effects of gossip on your mental health

Also read: Where do Indians get their audacity to comment on bodies?