Can “friendfluence” save dating?

As you may be aware, Tinder recently declared “friendfluence” one of the top dating trends of the new year, reporting that nearly half of daters say their friends have a significant influence on their love lives—including who they date.

Of course, introducing a new partner to your friends or merging social circles in a relationship has always been a major part of dating. But according to Devyn Simone, Tinder’s resident relationship expert, “friendfluence” is about more than just getting a vibe check from the group chat on a potential match or testing whether a new beau can hang with your crew. Per Simone, this trend reflects a broader shift within modern dating culture, one that speaks to how Gen Z “is rewriting the rules of romance” and reframing dating as a communal experience as opposed to a solo pursuit.

Much of this shift likely stems from social media and the rise of DatingTok. From “Date With Me” videos where TikTokers document first dates to creators taking to social media to share dating horror stories, declare new trends, and give advice, TikTok has turned modern dating into a shared activity rather than an individual one.

You might argue that a culture of “dating as content” has only made real connection seem all the more elusive in an increasingly online and increasingly lonely world. But according to Simone, the Gen Z urge to engage with other people’s dating lives on TikTok actually reflects this generation’s investment in community and a desire to merge rather than compartmentalize various parts of their lives. “It reinforces the idea that relationships don’t exist in a vacuum; they’re meant to live within real social worlds, not just one-on-one pressure cookers,” Simone tells Cosmopolitan. “Dating isn’t a solo mission anymore. It’s a team sport.”

While the rise of DatingTok may have influenced this more community-minded approach to dating, Simone says “friendfluence” isn’t just happening online. In fact, it may actually be a product of this generation’s growing desire for real-life connection and experience in a Very Online world.

Beyond just consulting the group chat before a date or debriefing on TikTok after one, today’s daters are literally making their friends an active part of their dating lives by going on double dates together. According to Simone, Tinder’s Double Date feature has proven particularly popular among Gen Z since it debuted last summer, with users under 30 making up nearly 90 percent of Double Daters on the app. The idea of a double date over a one-on-one meetup seems to be especially appealing to women, with Tinder data finding female daters are almost three times more likely to like and match with a pair than with a solo profile.

“Dating is simply more fun and way less intimidating when your friends are part of the experience,” says Simone. “Bringing a friend into the mix takes the pressure off having to perform or be ‘on’ all the time and shifts dating back into something that feels social, supportive, and low-stakes.”

In addition to double dates making a comeback, group hangs are also on the rise as an alternative to the traditional one-on-one first date model. Many daters today are “choosing more social, low-pressure ways to connect that feel safer and more organic,” says Simone, adding that this approach can also make dating feel lower-stakes and less goal-oriented—more about simply having fun than worrying about whether or not your latest match is “the one.”

Meanwhile, it doesn’t hurt to have your friends along for the ride to help spot red flags and provide an informed post-date review. “For Gen Z, dating decisions aren’t made in isolation; they’re workshopped in real time with the people you trust most,” says Simone. “If someone can’t hang with your friends, or at least survive the group chat vibe check, that usually tells you what you need to know.”

That said, while “friendfluenced” dating may feel safer and more fun, relationship expert Sarah Hensley, PhD, founder of The Love Doc, cautions against letting friends have too much influence on your love life. “I do think it’s healthy to go on double dates, but forcing your partner to pass a ‘friends test’ is not,” says Hensley. “You are an autonomous person, and your relationship choices should reflect your own decision-making.”

Of course, almost all dating trends have a toxic side. But at its core, Simone says “friendfluence” may be the antidote to dating burnout that today’s daters need. “It lowers the stakes, brings the fun back, and creates an experience that feels more human,” she says. “When dating stops feeling like a first-round job interview and starts feeling more social than performative, people loosen up. They’re more themselves. Connection hits differently when it feels supported, social, and low-pressure from the start.”

So here’s to dates that feel less like a job and more like hanging out with your besties. May 2026 be the year we finally make dating fun again...with a little help from our friends.