Here's What Your Questionable Character Crush Says About You

These guys are supposed to be gross...so why are they...hot?

10 August, 2020
Here's What Your Questionable Character Crush Says About You

Tiny sunglasses. The masked singer. Shoes with separated toes. Hollywood is into some extremely questionable stuff. We can probably chalk a lot of this up to strange personal tastes, but you can’t deny that this collective infatuation with kinda-yucky but sorta-hunky fictional guys is worth more than an eyebrow raise. Honestly, we *know* we shouldn’t lust over them. And if we stopped thirsting and started thinking about why they’re so messed up, we’d probably (maybe) be turned off. But that wouldn’t be any fun, and besides, most of these nasties have at least one redeeming quality, right? Right???

2

Your crush: the joker
Clown make-up; greasy, green hair; and a rusty three-piece suit are what nightmares are made of. Yet...those dimples magically cancel it all out. 
what it says about you 
You don’t stay sad for long, which is great—and a little unnerving. You can go from crying in the club to screaming Rihanna lyrics into your front camera in a minute flat. 

3

Your crush: 
Lucius Malfoy
He’s basically Lori Loughlin the way he bought his son’s way onto the Quidditch team. But, okay, that magic stick he’s always handling is pretty sexy.
what it says about you 
Honestly, anyone who’s into Lucius is just confused. It’s his hair you want, not his heart. Do some soul searching and get back to us.

 

1

Your crush: Bane
Does the ‘B’ in ‘BDSM’ stand for ‘Bane’? (Actually, we probably shouldn’t joke about the mask. This villain’s backstory is BRUTAL.)  
what it says about you 
You (loudly) announce it every time your phone battery hits 69%. There’s legit nothing you can’t turn into a sexual innuendo.

 

4

Your crush: Thanos
Like a SoundCloud rapper, he has basically formed an entire personality around being very into flashy jewellery and death. 
what it says about you 
You definitely went through a significant emo phase in middle school and probably still have a few My Chemical Romance graphic tees at your parents’ house.

 

5

Your crush: 
The Incredible Hulk
He’s a meathead, but also the sort of guy who’d suggest watching The Goldfinch instead of It: Chapter Two because he’d rather feel stuff than jump out 
of his seat. 
what it says about you 
As cliché as it sounds, your affection for The Hulk means that you always look for the good in people (and/or in mutants).

 

6

Your crush: 
Gomez Addams
He’s an attorney who loves losing cases and bragging about being voted ‘Least Likely to Succeed’. He’s also a famously passionate lover...
what it says about you 
You’re the friend people text when they want advice, but secretly want permission to do the bad thing. You will always suggest a fancy club over happy hour.

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