5 toe-curling BDSM techniques to try if you’re a complete beginner

Take your sexy time to the next level!

02 May, 2024
5 toe-curling BDSM techniques to try if you’re a complete beginner

Generally, when people think about BDSM, they picture whips, chains, and a room full of objects that could easily be mistaken for mediaeval torture devices. This is a gross misrepresentation. BDSM is not about deriving sadistic pleasure by physically or mentally harming someone. It is an umbrella term that more or less stands for bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, and sadomasochism. And while all these terms sound daunting in their own right, BDSM is purely based on consent, communication, and trust, making it one of the safest forms of sex.

If you have been intrigued by the idea of bondage but don’t know where to start, you’ve come to the right page. But before we tell you about the techniques you can try, it’s crucial to remember to have a conversation with your partner about everything you want to explore and even come up with a safe word. Once you’ve done this and you’re both on the same page, these are some entry-level BDSM techniques you can try. 

Biting 

If you’re considering BDSM but don’t know where to start, biting is a good first step. We must tell you that biting doesn’t always mean littering your partner's neck (and other parts) with hickeys—unless that is what you both are into. Remember, this is an experiment to test your pain tolerance and just how much you're comfortable with. So, don’t randomly sink your teeth into your partner. Start with nibbling, and then gradually turn the intensity nozzle up. This will tell you what works and what doesn’t work for you both. 

Sensation play 

Another beginner-friendly technique that will leave you screaming with pleasure is sensation play. Basically, one partner is lightly restrained and blindfolded (this is optional, depending on their comfort levels), while the other introduces them to various sensations using different objects. For instance, running an ice cube over their breasts and nipples, dripping oil from a massage candle onto them followed by an erotic massage, or teasing them with spanks and pinches until they are begging to climax.

The idea is to explore the dynamics of a dom and sub-sexual relationship. The non-restrained person has all the control, while the restrained person has to surrender fully and enjoy being taken to the edge and back. 

Edging  

Don’t let the name scare you. Edging, in sexual parlance, refers to the practice of delaying orgasm for as long as possible before reaching climax. The point is to double the intensity of an orgasm by maximising the sexual energy. Your partner gets you to the brink of an orgasm and backs down, only to build it up again. When you are finally allowed to let go, what follows will make your toes curl. Delayed gratification is always so much sweeter.


Hair pulling  

Hair pulling is one of the most common, level-one BDSM techniques. It’s easy, it doesn’t require any toys, and it’s a great way to test the kinky waters. There's something thrilling about reaching for the hair in the throes of passion. And the most basic way to incorporate this into your routine is with the doggy position. It'll take the experience to a whole new level. But of course, like with all the other techniques, speak to your partner first rather than randomly tugging on their hair. 

Role-play various fantasies  

Ever wondered what it would be like to have a raunchy night with Harry Potter or Rachel Green? Well, now is the time to invest in some costumes and role-play some of your deepest, darkest fantasies. If you aren’t ready for this yet, something as simple as including “sir” or “madam” in your dirty talk can set the stage and open up so many sexual avenues. After all, power play (aka subbing and topping) is one of the most commonly known BDSM techniques. All you have to do is remember to stay in character!  

Feature image credits: Pexels

Also read: How you can introduce BDSM in the bedroom

Also read: Here is how you can have rough and steamy sex safely

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