Is healthy banter the secret to an ever-lasting relationship?

 Is healthy banter the secret to an ever-lasting relationship? 

By Sakshi Deshmukh
19 October, 2023
 Is healthy banter the secret to an ever-lasting relationship?

There’s a good chance that streaks of light-hearted banter could do more good to your relationship than you think. Don’t believe us? Think about all the times you went “aww” looking at Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds' banter on social media or take Virat and Anushka for instance. We have collectively nominated them as our favourite couple for eternity, mostly for their goofy teasing. 

So could banter be the secret to a healthy relationship? Experts claim that humour can be a great way of keeping the spark alive between couples. Some also say it’s healing. Playful and of course, consensual flirting, if done right, can lead you to have a deeper connection with your partner. But how? Let’s find out. 


A huge stress reliever 

Picture this: You start your day by spilling coffee on your white dress, and before you know it, you’re late for a 9:00 a.m. meeting. When it’s your turn to pull notes at the weekly presentation, you realise you’ve left them behind at home. So, before it’s noon, your day is ruined. Just then, a flirtatious text from your partner pops up on your phone screen, and instantly changes your mood. 

In a long-term relationship, the flirting phase usually dies out quickly. Putting conscious effort into small acts like flirty texts can be instrumental in keeping the fun alive. It can also act as a huge stress reliever; a giggle or two makes everything better. 

Creates a deeper sense of friendship 

Humour can create a more intimate connection between two people. Research shows that shared waves of laughter indicate that two people view the world in the same way, aligning their opinions, making communication even easier. And isn’t sharing a little inside joke more fun with a partner? 

Prompts creative thinking
With banter comes non-stop comebacks. The funnier your partner’s response, the more witty and creative you get with your responses. However, it is important that you respect boundaries even while flirting. 


Develops a sense of safety 
Joking around and laughing with your partner creates a sense of comfort between you two and builds trust. In times of distress, your partner will start turning to you more often. 


Enhances chemistry 
Goofy responses or playful teasing can be a huge turn-on in a romantic setting. It can instantly spice things up by creating anticipation and an element of mystery of what’s coming next. And as they say, what is a relationship without chemistry, right? 


An easy red flag detector
One of the quickest ways to spot a red flag is by indulging in banter at an early stage. The initial sweet-talking gets you close to no real knowledge about a person. Banter can help you understand how your partner perceives an issue or situation. It can be the perfect filtering technique for you.


While banter can be great, it is important to maintain and respect boundaries in doing so. Here’s how you can keep it light, funny, and intimate. 

Pay attention to reactions: The rule of thumb, always pay attention to your partner's reactions. Withdraw immediately if they seem upset or uncomfortable. Next step: Apologise and re-learn your boundaries. 

Get consent: Consent is the most important part here. Only respecting each other’s intentions and willingness can result in healthy banter.

Check-in: Make sure you are both on the same page. Keep checking in between conversations to see if they’re okay. Ask them how they feel about a particular joke. 

Be mindful: Think twice before throwing jibes, for it can instantly come across as disrespectful. Keep it light and good-natured.