How to deal with your first heartbreak?

We know it’s tough...

How to deal with your first heartbreak?

Falling in love for the first time—those butterflies, the giggles, the anticipation—it’s all fun and games until they either ghost you, break your trust, or suddenly break up with you. Then comes the tough part, perhaps the worst of all—heartbreak. They say all firsts are special, but this one—your first heartbreak—is likely to make you want to set your clothes on fire. Suddenly, you find yourself crying more than usual, dwelling in nostalgia—basically, watching your mental health spiral downward. But the truth is, you'll have to push yourself to rise above and move on from them. But how do you do that? How do you deal with it at all? Here’s what you can do.

Stop reasoning their actions

One of the reasons it becomes so difficult for people to move on is because they continue to rationalize the actions of the heartbreaker. At this point, you might find yourself saying things like, “Did it happen because of me?” or “Maybe I did something wrong.” NO. You need to stop a) blaming yourself and b) justifying their reasons for what they did. Right now, your focus should be solely on yourself. 

Remember, crying is healing 

Don’t suppress your emotions. This is the time to release the sadness you’re holding onto. Cry. Let it all out. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed. Scientifically speaking, even studies show that crying actually helps you feel better. So, get a box of tissues, call your best friend, and cry out loud. For you need to embrace your rawest emotions during this time.

Don’t fight against your feelings 

Right now, you need to be truthful to yourself. Feel whatever you are feeling and don’t fight against it. If you feeling sad, feel it, if you are feeling angry, express it, if you miss them, feel that too. But don’t force yourself to not feel anything at all. It’s going to make you spiral and you will end up feeling worse than before.

Reach out for help 

Speak to your closest friends and family about it. Talking and sharing with the people you love often makes you feel better. If nothing else is helping, it's time to consider reaching out to a therapist who can help you navigate your feelings and guide you through this phase of your life.

Try to keep yourself busy

Sometimes, when you're alone and not occupied, your inner thoughts can become louder and harder to ignore. To prevent this, keeping yourself busy can help: going to the gym, making plans with friends, taking up a sport, or reading a book are all great ways to divert your mind. However, it's important to note that staying busy shouldn't mean avoiding your feelings altogether.

Lead image credit: Pexels

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