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The Wrong Reasons to Like a Guy

Falling in love is exciting, but there’s a big difference between being head-over-heels and forcing a situation.

The love game can be a hard one to play; there are so many rules, so much competition, and so many darned players. You’d be forgiven for contemplating settling on Mr Near Enough just so you can get the hell out of the dating pool! We know your girlfriends are all loved up, you’re fast approaching your self-imposed deadline to get hitched. But because we’ve been there, consider this our friendly offering; a list of reasons not to date that dude.

1.You’re on a tight deadline
We mean the deadline many women give themselves for having their life ‘sorted’. Like deciding to be married by 28, and by 30 you’ll have kids. Except now you’re 30 and you’re no closer to meeting the guy who blows your mind. Cue the panic that sets in among so many women, along with the urge to grab the closest guy, marry him and offer to have
his babies—because hey, he’ll do, and dammit you’re on a deadline! 
Relax, sista! Who cares if you haven’t met a stupid deadline you set yourself years ago. Chances are you’re single because your life is too full and fab to have a spare second for dating.

2. You feel left out and lonely
Your friends are spending weekends with their BFs and your colleagues share stories about their significant other. So clearly you feel like you’re the only bored, single chick on the planet. It’s times like these that we make questionable decisions. Stop right there. Dating someone because you’re lonely means you value the idea more than the person. Bad call.

3. You like what he represents
Being with someone purely because of what he represents, or what he can give you, is a pretty shaky foundation. Similarly, many women will choose a guy
because he seems to be ‘safe’. They’re certain he’s a family man, or he can provide for them. But is that enough?
Ask yourself this. If he didn’t have that ‘perk’, would you be interested? No? Then end it.

4. Everyone else really likes him
Your mom adores him, your dad says he’s a keeper, and even your bestie thinks he’s your perfect match. If we’re not sure about someone, we can rely on other people’s opinions rather than our own. The thing is, none of these people are dating him—you are. Woah, hold up. While there’s nothing wrong with the people who know you best, pointing out a guy they think you may click with, it’s your gut that needs to drive you in any decision-making. If you’re pretty sure you have nothing in common, there’s
no spark, or you flat-out can’t stand the guy—walk away.

5. You’re caught up in a moment
That guy was ‘just perfect’ when you met him over summer. But often when your dream guy reappears, the initial spark has gone. That’s because the reality doesn’t live up to the idea we’ve created. And, while he sure is a great dancer, the party dude could be a useless conversationalist. Here’s the thing: There’s no point in trying to turn someone into your ideal of what you’d like them to be. Don’t waste your time, they’ll only disappoint you.

But do date the guy who:

  •  You can’t stop talking about (even when you try to).
  •  Has your sense of humour.
  •  Makes you blush when he winks or smiles at you.
  •  You can’t wait to see.
  •  Gives you butterflies.
  •  You fantasize about growing old with.