What do single people even do?

It’s almost impressive how quickly some people decide that being single means you have nothing going on. Tell someone you’re not seeing anyone and, suddenly, they’re wondering who you’re going home to, whether you’re “putting yourself out there”, and what you possibly do with all that free time. Surely, you're spending your evenings scrolling through dating apps, wondering when your "person" will finally show up. Because apparently, without a partner to text “what are you doing tonight?”, the rest of your life ceases to exist.

Except single people are, quite literally, busy living it. They are making dinner plans three weeks in advance, booking spontaneous trips, picking up hobbies, building careers, nurturing friendships, spending time alone, and enjoying the occasional Tuesday night spent ordering their favourite food and watching three episodes of something because they can. 

Being single doesn’t mean your life is waiting for someone to arrive and make it more interesting. It can mean having a full calendar, a full social life, a full inbox and, yes, sometimes a very peaceful evening with absolutely nothing to do. And honestly, that’s the point. A relationship can be wonderful, but it isn’t a prerequisite for having somewhere to be, someone to love, things to look forward to, or a life that feels like yours.

So, when I saw an Instagram post with the quote "What do single people even do?" I knew exactly whom to reach out to, and it turns out, they had a lot to say. 

"What do we do? We live. We make plans, cancel plans, travel, flirt, have sex, have fun, fall in love, fall out of love. We have entire personalities outside of who we are dating." - Schenelle Dsouza

They make plans because they want to

A Friday night doesn't need to come with a plus one attached. Single people are perfectly capable of making plans simply because something sounds fun. Dinner with friends, a last-minute gig, a pottery class, a solo movie, or an impromptu night drive. It doesn't need to be a date to count as a good time.

"Being single means I get to live life according to how I love it, without being accountable for anyone else's emotions, likes, or considerations. I run businesses, go wherever I want, work out whenever I want, and spend time with friends who are also building their own business. For me, that's a love life in itself." - Cris Dion 

There's also something wonderfully liberating about making plans entirely on your own mood. Want to dress up and go somewhere fancy? Do it. Want to order takeout and watch three episodes of the same show? Also valid. 

They invest in their friendship 

Romantic relationships aren't the only relationship worth showing up for. For many single people, friendships are a huge part of their everyday lives, and they can be just as exciting, chaotic, and emotionally fulfilling. 

There are birthday dinners, group chats that never sleep, weekend trips, coffee runs, girls' nights, boys' nights, random Tuesday catch-ups, and the friend who somehow always has a crisis at 11 pm. A full social life doesn't require a romantic partner. Sometimes, your people are already right there. 

They discover hobbies they actually like 

When you are not constantly trying to coordinate your life with another person, there's plenty of room to figure out what you enjoy. Maybe it's learning how to DJ, taking dance classes, getting weirdly competitive about padel, baking elaborate cakes, going to the gym, painting, reading, travelling, or finally learning the guitar you brought three years ago. 

"My routine doesn’t really change based on my relationship status. I make time for the things I love—reading, painting, writing, exploring cafés, or going on long drives. Whether I’m with friends, family, a partner, or by myself, I just try to be present in the moment.” - Shreya Shah. 

So no, your hobby doesn't have to become a side hustle. Sometimes it can simply be something you are terrible at but enjoy doing anyway. 

They spend time alone, and actually enjoy it 

There is a difference between being lonely and being alone. Sometimes you just need to spend time alone with yourself to recharge from all the social life that you have, and sometimes being alone is fun. There is something quite underrated about having it entirely to yourself. You can put your phone on Do Not Disturb, make your favourite meal, take an unnecessarily long shower, put on a face mask, and watch something nobody else would willingly watch with you.

"I keep myself occupied with work, the gym, running, and staying productive. I do sometimes yearn for love or someone, but my past experiences have taught me a lot. For now, I am comfortable keeping myself busy and spending time on myself." - Adhvate Arora

No negotiation. No compromise. No "what do you want to do?" followed by 45 minutes of "I don't mind". Just you. 

They do absolutely nothing 

Honestly, this might be the most important one. Not every day needs to be packed with plans to prove that you have a life. Sometimes single people lie in bed until noon on a Sunday. Sometimes they cancel plans. Sometimes they spend an entire day watching comfort shows, ordering food, and ignoring the outside world. That's not a symptom of a lonely life. That's just being a person. 

FYI, they date too when they feel like it

Being happily single doesn't necessarily mean being anti-dating. Some single people are actively dating, some are casually dating, some are on the apps for entertainment, and some have deleted them all and refuse to go back. The important part is that dating doesn't have to become the main storyline. A date can just be a date. It doesn't have to be an audition for a future spouse, and being single doesn't have to be treated like a temporary condition that needs fixing. 

The idea that single people need to constantly prove they’re having fun misses the point entirely. A fulfilling life isn’t measured by how packed your calendar is, how many people you’re dating, or whether there’s someone waiting for you at home. Sometimes it’s loud and social. Sometimes it’s spontaneous. Sometimes it’s ambitious, and sometimes it’s gloriously, unapologetically quiet. Sometimes all of that happens in the same week.

So, what do single people even do? They make plans. They cancel them. They fall in love with new hobbies, old friends, bad TV shows and their own company. They build careers, book flights, go out, stay in, and figure out what they actually want their lives to look like. In other words, they live. A relationship can be a wonderful part of that life, but it doesn’t have to be the thing that makes it a life in the first place.

Lead image: IMDb

Also read: Soft-launching a relationship is more stressful than being single

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