Throwback to the Time When The Vampire Diaries Co-Creator and Executive Producer Julie Plec Found Herself Under Attack Online

SOME YEARS AGO,

Nina Dobrev revealed that she was leaving The Vampire Diaries. The shock, tears, and rage amongst fans were understandable. But what I never saw coming was the anger directed at me. I was the enemy... the devil. Suddenly, I found myself on the receiving end of a social media hate campaign.

They renamed me Julie ‘Plague’ and pasted my head onto the body of The Hulk, Tweeting what a disgusting creature I must
be. I was sickened and stunned. This character I’d helped create and shaped to be adored was being used against me as proof of why I should “DIE, B*TCH”.

The point of this is not to say how my feelings were hurt (they were) or how unfair it is that people can insult others under the disguise of anonymity (it is) or how social media has become a violent minefield (it has). Rather, the point is that I learned something about myself as I was being bullied: I can also be a ‘Mean Girl’.

I realised that I get pleasure when I’m told, “Don’t listen to the haters, they’re losers in their moms’ basements.” I imagine these ‘losers’ and feel better about myself. I judge girls in super-tight, short dresses, and four-inch platform heels. I find myself irritated by hipsters with Jesus beards and people who can’t spell. I overflow with both silent and expressed judgement, which means I’m just as capable of being cruel as those I rage against are. As a result of this discovery, I decided to shift the way I looked at the world— to eye everyone (even the most vicious haters) through a prism of compassion, kindness, and understanding. Is the loser in the basement just angry because she has no one to talk about how alienated and bored she is in this frustrating world? Am I just jealous that the girl in the too-tight dress isn’t afraid to show off her curvy body when I feel like I’m not attractive unless I hide mine?

Daily, I visualise the smart-*ss troll who lives deep in my subconscious, and I pelt him with rainbows and unicorns. I fight a battle against my judgemental thoughts. And when an opportunity arises to gain acceptance or popularity at the expense of someone else, I zip it. The more we engage in the way that everyone else engages, the more followers, Likes, and RTs we get. But we can’t rail against the cyberbullies without acknowledging what we also contribute to a culture of cruelty. As you live your life and accumulate friends—IRL and on social media—ask yourself: are you a bully too? If so, and the urge to strike out hits, imagine something that makes you smile, and let the snark stop there.

This article was published in the January 2016 issue of Cosmopolitan India.