1. The second the clock strikes midnight on NYE, you’ll be:
a. Just getting started. Who’s ready for the most epic 2am club crawl?!
b. Air-kissing your BFFs before they real-kiss their BFs.
c. Cracking open your new 2019 journal with your Future Is Female pen in hand.
2. Rent and food excluded, last year you spent the most money on:
a. Unredeemed (and now expired) voucher deals for fancy caviar facials and goat yoga.
b. An unlimited data plan, so you can binge-stream rom-coms whenever the thirst strikes.
c. Coffee, coffee, more coffee—and late-night Ubers home from work.
3. For your new profile picture, you used a photo from:
a. Halloween. The only thing scarier than your Handmaid’s Tale costume is the length of your roots RN.
b. Snapchat. So many selfies (glam filter on, of course) to choose from.
c. Your work ID.
4. Most Monday mornings, you wake up:
a. Hoping no-one will notice you’re wearing tights (again) ’cause you’re way too beat to shave.
b. From yet another dream starring your (hotter-than-you-remember) ex.
c. In a cold sweat, convinced you slept through your alarm and will get fired.
5. You keep seeing ads online for:
a. That gross new ‘natural’ wine.
b. Crystal thongs and gold-chrome vibrators.
c. Desk lamps, desk organiers, desk trays...all the desk stuff!
You’ve been neglecting someone super-important: you. Start treating yourself with fancy face oils, -massages, and fresh smoothies—and maybe try eight hours of sleep once in a while. Healthy choices lead to happy feels.
REHAB YOUR LOVE LIFE
Being single is glam and all, but it sounds like you’re ready for your next bae. Take some risks. Forget about your type, put yourself out there, and get what’s yours (be it short-term satisfaction or settling down).
RETHINK YOUR JOB
Girl, you’ve got drive, but your personal life is taking a hit. Now is the time to readjust those workaholic tendencies...or get a new gig. It may seem intimidating, but charging down a new path could end up saving your sanity.