Does it feel more like platonic relationship now? Has passion taken a back seat? If it’s a resounding yes, you need to know that you are not alone. It's easy to feel that way when you and your partner are busy with other aspects of life, be it a job, family or other concerns. So how do you reignite the passion? We got in touch with Sheetal Shaparia, life coach and relationship counsellor to share tips and tricks that will help you press the reset button or restart on a strong passionate note.
Relive the past
Remember the time you both just started dating? How beautiful the feeling was and how you could never stop thinking about each other! To rekindle those feelings and bring the excitement back, revisit the places where you went as a new couple. For instance, go to the same restaurant where you went on your first date or maybe hit the same theatre together. Do things that brought you closer initially.
Make efforts to spend quality time with each other
It’s important to make efforts. If your partner is busy, you take the initiative to plan a date night, do something fun that you both enjoy like cooking, watching your favourite movie or something as simple as sitting on the terrace and talking. Don’t just try to do something that he loves and you don’t. Identify your partner’s strengths, and pair it with yours and plan something that you both love to do. Spending some private time with your partner every day is the key to maintaining a strong connection.
Talk it out
The simplest thing you could do is, at least once in a while, sit down with your partner and talk. Unlike the regular conversations, check on each other, tell them what you’re expecting in the relationship and where they’re going wrong, talk about the problems that you both are facing and how you can solve them. Constructive criticism once in a while is healthy and can prevent arguments and fights.
Learn to accept and forgive
Everyone makes mistakes, you do too. Don’t hold grudges against your partner for things that can be fixed. Try and forget their past mistakes and make room for forgiveness. Holding resentment will just make it harder for both of you.
Show your appreciation
Appreciate things that your partner does for you, be it as small as giving you a glass of water or as big as planning a romantic date for you. Just acknowledging his efforts could help you maintain a healthy relationship. He would know that you still love and respect him.
Focus on intimacy
Just because your circumstances have changed - if you got married or had kids it doesn't mean your sex life should stop. You'll have to work at ensuring you still desire each other. Buy new lingerie, plan a special night, throw a surprise at him, get rid of the clutter at home, get some scented candles. Simple things like this could make it more exciting for both of you.