While it sounds like an extreme sport that might attract adrenaline junkies, edging, in sexual parlance, refers to the practice of delaying orgasm for as long as possible before reaching the climax. Does it sound like a form of torture used as punishment in the Middle Ages? Yes, for sure, but the technique actually doubles the intensity of your orgasms.
A lot has been said about how you can make your orgasms more intense—some people double down on the foreplay, while others experiment with handcuffs or blindfolds—but edging is often overlooked. The idea is to get yourself or your partner until the brink of an orgasm, then back down, only to build it up again. When you finally let go, what follows will make your toes curl. The point is to make the sex last longer by increasing the build-up of sexual energy.
We live in a very orgasm-oriented world. And while there is nothing wrong with having sex with the sole mission to reach your climax, there comes a point when the focus needs to be on enjoying the journey. And by taking orgasms off the table (even if it’s just for a few minutes), you have the space to do exactly that. You are free from the burden of getting yourself or your partner across the line as soon as possible, and this means you can actually appreciate the foreplay and the build-up for as long as you or your partner can go. Remember, it’s a marathon and not a sprint.
Apart from allowing you to get to know your own and your partner’s body better, edging also makes the seemingly unattainable goal of ‘making love all night’ possible. Or, at the least, it can enable you to go longer than your usual time. It also helps those who suffer from pre-ejaculation issues. The longer you edge for, the more intense the orgasm (when you finally allow yourself or your partner to finish) will be.
Basic techniques to try
The stop-and-start method
This technique of edging requires taking small breaks during masturbation or oral sex sessions. It simply requires you to bring yourself or your partner until the very edge and pull back when they are about to finish. Stop for a short time and build the stimulation back up again. However, just remember that it takes practice and patience.
When you or your partner is about to orgasm, stop what you’re doing and focus on stimulating some other part of the body. This form of edging may seem frustrating at the moment but when you’re finally allowed the release, it’ll all be worth it.
Mindfulness and controlled breathing
When you feel like you’re about to climax, take deep breaths. It might help control the orgasm until you’re finally allowed (by yourself or your partner) to cum. It is also helpful to focus on every individual sensation while edging as it helps you appreciate the journey leading up to an orgasm.
This one is especially for all those of you with a penis. It entails getting yourself till the brink and squeezing the tip of the penis for about 30 seconds right when you’re about to cum, and then building the stimulation back up. It may take you some practice, but if done in addition to the stop-and-start method, it may give you the kind of orgasms that make you see stars in the day.