Are first dates becoming an excuse to get your chores done?

Not every date needs candlelight, cocktails, or a reservation booked two weeks in advance. Scroll through Instagram or Reddit, and you'll find people inviting matches on IKEA runs, grocery shopping trips, bookstore visits, farmers' market strolls, gym sessions, indoor pickleball games, or even a quick trip to buy a new desk lamp. Welcome to the era of the errand date, where romance meets real life.

Before you accuse everyone of outsourcing their to-do lists, there's more to this trend than free labour. Many singles are deliberately choosing everyday activities because they feel less like interviews and more like actual life. Instead of spending two hours asking, "So, what do you do?", you're assembling shopping carts, debating cereal brands, getting lost in IKEA, or discovering who has surprisingly strong opinions about pillows or indoor plants. It sounds silly, but it also tells you a lot about someone.

By now, it's well established that shared experiences help conversations flow naturally. And that's exactly why activity dates have exploded in popularity over the past few years. Coffee walks turned into museum dates, then pottery classes, and now people are simply folding dating into errands they were already planning to do.

An IKEA trip has become something of an internet favourite because it accidentally compresses months' worth of relationship questions into one afternoon. How patient are they when something goes wrong? Do they enjoy planning? Can they make decisions? How mindful are they of their finances? Are they willing to push the trolley while you spend 20 minutes choosing a lamp? It feels playful, but you're also seeing how they move through everyday situations.

Bookstores work for a similar reason. Instead of awkward small talk, people naturally start discussing their favourite authors, childhood reads, or the kinds of books they wish they had more time to finish. Indoor sports clubs, gyms, mini-golf courses, and pickleball courts also take the pressure off constant conversation. You have something to do together, which often makes the chemistry easier to spot.

Let's be honest: sometimes the internet does blur the line. Videos joking about taking a Hinge match to IKEA because "I need help carrying furniture" regularly rack up millions of views. Others joke about bringing dates grocery shopping so someone else can reach the top shelf or weigh in on which pasta sauce to buy. Most of these posts are clearly tongue-in-cheek, but they have sparked conversations about whether people are becoming a little too comfortable mixing romance with productivity.

The difference comes down to intention. If your "date" is actually three hours of helping you move apartments, your match will probably notice. But if you're inviting someone into an ordinary part of your life while making the experience fun for both of you, that's very different. Then the errand simply becomes the backdrop.

There's another reason this trend feels so refreshing. Traditional dinner dates can be expensive, formal, and full of pressure. Activity-based dates are often cheaper, more relaxed, and easier to leave if the vibe isn't there. They also remove some of the performance that comes with sitting across from a stranger, trying to impress each other.

Ironically, doing something completely ordinary may be the quickest way to see whether someone fits into your actual life. If you can survive getting lost in IKEA together without arguing over lamp sizes or meatballs, you might just deserve a second date. And if nothing else, you'll leave with a new lamp and a funny story.

Lead image: IMDb

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