Gather around girls, as I relate a familiar tale of modern love. You meet a cute guy, and boom, the sparks are flying! After the initial flirting, making out and getting to know each other, you find yourself catching the feels, big time!
The problem is, things don't seem to move. It's clear that he likes you, but he just doesn't seem to commit. Now you are torn. A part of you wants to play it cool and see where things are going. So, you shy away from asking THAT awkward question (We are talking about the "are we dating?" question just FYI, not "is that a third nipple?", silly!) The second part (she lives within all of us my friends) has secretly started picking out wedding venues and baby names, no matter how many times you sternly warn yourself to 'chill'. If you find yourself questioning where your relationship is going, or wondering if he is into you, let us help you get some clarity. Read the points below as we help you decode his signs.
7 Definitive Signs He is Not Ready For a Relationship
1. You find it difficult to broach the topic of commitment
Major red flag ladies! if you feel like you can't even talk about where you two are heading, or you're scared as to how he will react, part of you already knows that he's not ready for something serious.
2. He makes empty promises
Dates that don't materialise time and again, and plans that are rarely followed through are yet another clear sign that he is not looking at this relationship seriously.
3. He is talking to other people
We mean in a flirty, romantic way. You might argue that the two of you are not exclusive YET and he is free to do what he wants, but if he is still investing his time in talking to other people, it means he is still 'shopping around' aka not ready to commit.
4. He's not there for you when you need him
Bad day at work, or trouble at home? If your man isn't there to support you through the rough stuff, he is not looking at this as a serious relationship. Trust us girl, you deserve someone who wants's to be your rock.
5. He doesn't fully open up to you
If you feel you know him on the outside, but his walls are up when it comes to the deeper stuff (family, dreams, goals, fears), that means he's not letting you in. When you are truly into someone, you are comfortable being vulnerable around them.
6. He is hesitant to make you meet his friends or family, or even mention you to them
We are not saying you need to meet the in-laws on your third date, but if you have known him for a while without meeting any of his close pals, and if he doesn't mention you to his family, it means he is not thinking of this as a long-term option.
7. He disappears from time to time
This one is a major red flag. If he goes missing, comes and goes, or plays hot and cold, that means he is not taking this relationship seriously, and he possibly has something else going on on the side.
8. He doesn't mention you on social media
This one is not an absolute rule, as some people are just not into social media in general. But....if he is fairly active and communicative with others (read sharing frequent tags, posts and photographs), but suspiciously quiet about you, then he is just not that into you.
9. You feel it in your gut
Look, you can rationalise this all you want, but sometimes you just KNOW it when a guy isn't being quite right. Trust your instincts ladies, if someone is into you, you will feel it in your bones.
If you can identify with more than a couple of the above points, we think it's time to face what's really going on in your relationship. And hey, if you are cool with it and want to just have fun as well, you do YOU, babe!
But... if you are looking for a commitment and he is not giving you one, we suggest you call your girls over, bust out the rosé, play 'Single Ladies' on repeat, and move on to someone who deserves your time and energy. Remember, you are fabulous, and you should be with a man who is dying to get you all to himself.