Use these sweet, sexy, and silent suggestions to elevate your connection to a new level. Why? Because body language and special treats can mean more than constant couple chatter.
Yakking with your guy for hours is sheer bliss for you. But odds are, he'd rather scour the bathroom, do his taxes, dart into oncoming traffic, anything before sitting down for a heart-to-heart with you. There's fascinating science behind this: When a guy gets into an emotional conversation, it hyperarouses him and triggers a flood of the stress hormone cortisol throughout his body. So even if you're just gushing about how much you adore him, your man could feel uncomfortably superstimulated. But when you combine more touching, togetherness, and little gestures of appreciation, he feels more connected to you because you seem in sync on an indescribably emotional level. Below, are a whole bunch of ideas to try. After being on the receiving end of these treats, he'll catch on and reciprocate.
1. Order in food from his favourite sports bar (think wings and poppers) to watch a big game together.
2. When he treats you to a ride to work, give his thigh a little squeeze before getting out of the car. It'll help him feel connected to you, even when you're apart all day.
3. While waiting in line for an unisex bathroom, pull him into the loo. You don't have to jump on him, but even a quick make-out session can be electrifying.
4. Slip some screws or nails in to his toolbox after he's done a mini home repair at your place to show your gratitude.
5. When quietly walking together, stick your hand in his pocket.
6. The next time your phone rings while you're just hanging out, check the caller
Times he does need to talk
Yes, silence can be golden, but here are body cues that he actually has something to get off his chest.
1. Clenching his jaw as if he's trying to keep from saying something to you.
2. Giving a shoulder shrug,a sign of helplessness.
3. Crossing his arms when certain topics come up, a show of defensiveness
How to help?
Sit beside him when he's involved in a passive activity, like channel surfing. Put your hand on his arm, and as you feel his muscles relax a bit, say "It seems like something's on your mind. Can I get you anything?" If he won't open up, don't pry, but keep the physical connection. If he does spill, just listen so he knows how much it means for him to share it with you.
ID, and if it's not urgent, ignore it to show him he's your top priority.
1. While he's getting dressed for a night out, help him button up his shirt, but do it from behind so he can feel every curve of your body pressing into him.
2. Pick a regular time, like lunch hour, and send a what-I'm-doing-right-now e-mail or text. This simple routine will give him a treat to look forward to.
3. If you find a cute shirt for him on sale, hang it in his closet with a note that reads "I thought you'd look so hot in this!"
4. On a day you know he'll be under a massive work deadline, have his favourite sausage-olive-and-pepper pizza delivered right to his desk.
5. Ask his mom for a shot of him as a boy doing something great, like his gamewinning Little League pitch. Frame it, and put it in your place where you know he'll see it.
6. Provided he doesn't have an assistant, leave him a naughty voice mail after he leaves for work. Describe what you want him to do, and tell him that "for more, you'd better race back right home...."
7. Extend the average three-second hug to six, and squeeze him at least this long once a week. He'll feel double the love.
8. When his car is filthy, play out his ultimate fantasy of a hot girl soaping up his ride. (ClichÃ©, yes, but hey, it works.)
9. Savour a meal together in silence, even if it's a quick Monday frozen dinner. Make kissing in elevators your little ritual. If you're in one alone, plant one on him as the doors are about to open.
10. When that tricky pickle jar won't open, just hand him the damn thing. It's an unspoken "you're macho" compliment.
11. Pack a thermos of spiked hot chocolate, and go on a quiet midwinter hike.
12. Challenge him to an ongoing Guitar Hero or Wii Sports tennis tournament. Weekly duels rev up your adrenaline, which makes him physiologically frisky.
13. When he leaves his towel on the floor, roll it up and snap him on the ass with it instead of barking "Seriously, were you raised by warthogs?"
14. Make sure you have a prework quickie each week. When you share them more often, you will soon begin to associate just the sight of him with spontaneous positive and naughty experiences.
15. Stack his poker-chip box with chocolate ones (find them at www.rolscandycorner.com) to enjoy on a game night.
16. As he exits the shower, wrap him in a fresh-from-the-dryer towel.
17. Tear out pictures in travel magazines of places you want to go with him. Then attach notes that read "I want you to ravish me here, and here, and here...."
18. Play naughty Jenga: Write racy dares on each game block that you have to act out when you pull one from the tower.
19. On a supercold night, slide thermal socks on his feet, and kiss your way up to his mouth to keep him warm.
20. As he falls asleep, massage his temples in rhythm with his inhale and exhale. When your bodies are in sync, he'll feel totally at ease and connected.
21. If you're picking up coffee and doughnuts on a Saturday morning, write "I love (his name)" on one with inexpensive grocery-store icing.
22. Buy tickets to his favourite band's show in another city so you have an excuse for a minitrip.
23. If you hear about a routine traffic jam on his everyday route, print out an alternate route for him to take, give it a lipstick-print kiss, and then stick it on to his dashboard.
24. When you cozy up together for a little weekend reading (your precious copy of Cosmo, of course), come prepared with some magazines he wouldn't normally buy for himself (such as a specialty sports title like Slam if he's a basketball fan).
25. If either of you has a dog, take little Bowser out together on a lazy Sunday afternoon for a long hand-in-hand walk in the park and frolicking with a Frisbee.
26. Skip the contrived chocolate-body-paint routine in bed. Instead, nosh on warm blondies with hot-fudge sauce -over ice cream after you've done the deed (but while you're still nekkid).
Fuse with your guy when he's gone
Quick things that let him know you care during his physical absences...
1. Send a random love note scented with your regular perfume to his home or to the hotel where he'll be staying on a trip.
2. DVR the TV shows you know he'll hate missing out on so he can enjoy a marathon when he returns.
3. Shoot him a picture mail of you blowing a kiss or an image of your bed with the text "Counting down the hours until you meet me here."
4. Do his laundry when he's not at home, and then "accidentally" slip in your panties in his stack of clothes.
5. Load a podcast by his favourite comedian onto his iPod pretravel so he'll have something to lighten his mood.
6. Paste the best posts from the blogs he reads into a daily email so he won't miss a beat.
7. Look up a list of great restaurants in the city he's visiting, and send links to online reviews in case he has no time to find good eats.
8. Write cute (or naughty, the choice is yours) messages for your guy on post-its and put them all around the house.