“Self-Love Is Not How Good You Look On Instagram": Sania Mirza

Picking up a tennis racket at the age of six didn’t just go on to define Sania Mirza in the years that followed, but it also shaped what was going to be the tennis star’s relationship with her body, for life. Growing up, Sania didn’t worry about what ‘looked’ good or bad on her, like girls her age possibly did. Instead, she focused on building a body that could better her game—a muscular, athletic body. And much of that early learning stays with her—even after almost two decades of playing professionally, six Grand Slam doubles titles to her name, a decade of marriage, and a one-year-old son. Comfortable with her body, in all its ‘perfections’ and ‘imperfections’. Read her exclusive chat, where she opens up with Cosmo India. 

Cosmo: As a sportsperson, what were some of the challenges you had to face during the lockdown?  
Sania Mirza: “The biggest was not to be able to practise tennis! Physical activities are such a huge part of our lives normally, and even though I was able to do some stuff in this phase, I missed playing the sport. I am also used to travelling a lot, being out and about...so I miss that, too. Not just as a sportsperson, there were things that affected me as a human being, too, and altered my perspective. And my son, Izhaan, and I were stuck away from my husband [cricketer, Shoaib Malik]...which was a huge personal challenge. We haven’t seen each other for almost five months now!”

C: And what has been your biggest realisation or lesson in the current crisis?  
SM: “It has definitely taught me the importance of good health. And how you often take it for granted, especially when you are young and feel that you are almost invincible! The pandemic has made me realise how vulnerable we all are, and how a virus can bring the entire world to a standstill. It has made me rethink my priorities and what is truly important in life...like well-being, staying close to family, the importance of relationships. 
 Another epiphany of sorts that I have had during this time is that we don’t need much to be happy...basic things are enough. I think we forget that, sometimes. When there was no pandemic, we often went overboard in trying to make ourselves happy or to live extravagant lives. I am guilty of that, too. But the last three or four months have been great eye-openers. Having said that, and while staying at home has been amazing, I am never going to take having a coffee at a café for granted again. Or going for a walk, or just being out in public.”

C: What is your idea of self-love?
SM: “To appreciate every single thing I have in life, big and small. To have gratitude for even the littlest things, like being able to have a cup of tea by myself. For me, self-love comes from within. Nothing and no-one can make you love yourself. Also, self-love is not about your outward appearance or how good you look on Instagram. It is how you feel on the inside when there’s no camera on.”

C: And on the path of self-love, what are some things you think we need to do less of?
SM: “We need to stop comparing our lives, bodies, and faces to others’. I don’t think any two people’s lives can be the same...or their bodies or faces, for that matter. The first step towards self-love, for me, is to be content with who you are and what you have. Self-love actually begins only when you start to appreciate what you have...and not focus on whether others have more or less than you.”

C: And what’s the one thing we need to do more of?
SM: “Like I said, we need to be able to appreciate ourselves more, and find happiness within. Sure, you should aspire for more, but I don’t think that should be in comparison with anyone else. The inspiration to gain more should be derived from within. And one major thing I think women can do to be able to love themselves a little bit more is to stop hating on other women. I feel, sometimes, that women are women’s biggest enemies. They just sit and criticise...even if they have nothing to say, they’ll talk! And those are the kind of women I just can’t stand! If you start loving yourself a little bit more, maybe you won’t be so critical towards other women!”