Is temperature play a way to heat up your sex life?

There comes a point in everyone’s life when they crave creativity in their sex life. It’s why sex toys are a gigantic industry and Kamasutra is one of the most famous books in the world. Everyone wants to learn about new ways to catalyse and intensify their orgasms. While you might have considered stepping into the world of BDSM, indulging in role-play, or even introducing a sex game, have you ever stopped to consider literally turning the heat up? No, we don’t mean anything that might risk you burning your house down. We’re talking about temperature play. 

While this concept might sound like something Christian Grey would practice in his ‘red room’, it’s a pretty easy way of spicing up things between the sheets. The objective is to use the sensation of touch to help you get out of your head for the moment. How does this work? Temperature play is a form of erotic exploration that manipulates the neuroreceptors in your erogenous zones (please refer to Monica Geller’s diagram) with varied temperatures to turn you on sexually. This involves using a cold object such as ice or a hot object such as melted chocolate to heighten everything you are feeling.  

It’s understandable your idea of foreplay might not exactly be having an ice cube rubbed over your nipple or clit. However, when in the right spot, that mere ice cube has the ability to make your toes curl. So, if you’re looking to venture out of your comfort zone, and into something a tad hotter or colder, read on.  

How can you include temperature play in your sex life? 

Ice cubes  

If you’re wondering what a little cold feels like on your erogenous zones, ice cubes are a great and inexpensive stepping stone to temperature play. Take turns tracing an ice cube up and down on your partner's body. Focus a little more on their sexy zones (nipples, penis or the clitoris) and be mindful of how their body reacts. You could also pop the ice cube in your mouth and either kiss your partner all over or perform oral sex on them. Who said a little cold can’t be hot? 

A bath or a shower  

Another effortless way of indulging in some temperature play is taking the party into the shower. There are very few things steamier than a steamy bath with your partner. You could also try using a handheld shower to stimulate their genitals or any other zones you want. However, do remember to ensure that the temperature of the water isn’t scalding hot or numbing cold.  

Body oil candles 

Also called wax play, massage or body oil candles are a brilliant way of exploring temperature play. Light the candle and drip the wax (warm body oil) over your partner while they are blindfolded or restrained (optional but recommended because the element of surprise can only enhance the experience). You could also drip the wax over yourself in front of your partner to show them where you want to be touched and kissed. Don’t be afraid to get messy with it! 

Safety tip: Do not, we repeat, do not use regular candles in the bedroom. You could very easily burn yourself or your partner.  

Food  

Ice cream, popsicles, melted chocolate, cold whipped cream and whatever else your imagination can come up with are all viable and playful ways of indulging in temperature play. Not to mention how fun it would be to drip and then lick it off your partner? Just remember, when it comes to mixing food play and temperature play keep it away from the genital areas. Better safe than sorry, right?  

Sex toys 

If you have a sex toy that is made from either glass or metal, pop it into the freezer or in a tub of hot water for a few minutes. The feeling of the cold or hot glass on their body will enhance their sensations, translating into sexual arousal. However, remember that there is a boundary. If the sex toy is too hot or cold for you to hold it’s not suitable to be used on your partner.